Why should parents set up for routines for their kids? And what are the most important parts of effective routines for children?

Darren Hardy, New York Times best selling author of The Compound Effect, said, “A daily routine built on good habits and disciplines separates the most successful among us from everyone else.” This is surprisingly true. It is not intelligence, nor the correct family tree, nor good fortune. And while all those may offer assistance at times, it truly is the repetition of a well-honed routine that breeds consistent success.

As we creep towards and arrive at the beginning of a new school year, this offers the perfect opportunity for parents to help their school-age children develop a series of morning and afternoon routines that will successfully launch them into the 180-day orbit that is the school year.

Why establish routines

Children thrive on structure and routines, according to Seattle Children’s Hospital.

Why?

Kids feel safe and secure in their environment. This allows them to know what is happening now in the present and, more importantly, what is to come in the near future. Anxiety and frustration melt away into a puddle of the known. 

Routines also help children cope better with transitions, according to PBS Kids. Some children have a challenging time shifting from school to home. They may keep themselves together at school, saving the meltdown for the safety of home. Establishing an after-school routine can help with this transition period. Children practice their self-regulation skills, which will foster a more positive self-image and healthy social emotional development.

Finally, routines can reduce conflict and power struggles, according to The Kids Mental Health Foundation. Quite simply, when kids know what is expected of them there is a reduced chance of conflict and rebellious behavior. For example, knowing the expectation is to start homework after arriving home from school prevents the parent from having to remind and nag their child to do so.

How to set up routines that work

Strive to create a schedule that includes a designated homework time, healthy snack break, chores, physical activity – especially if your child does not play a formal sport, family connection time, down time, and free time. Additionally, name the location in your home where each activity is expected to occur.

Think about your child’s age, temperament, energy level, daily homework amount, and extra curricular activities, if any. Set up time blocks for each element in the schedule. 

Include your child in the process! The main elements need to be in the routine; however, your child can suggest the order and time length needed for each part. Coach, nudge, and sway as necessary. A two-hour video game session upon arriving home may not be the best start to an after school routine!

Be consistent as much as possible. The consistency creates predictability. And as the author Hardy shares, it is the daily repetition of these good habits that success is built on.

Perhaps most importantly: Post the schedule as a visual aid so that your child will see it each day upon entering your home.

What to do if your child won’t follow a routine

Of course all of this sounds great until your child looks at you like you have three heads and each one is speaking a different foreign language! Not every kid is going to automatically fall in line following even a reasonable routine.

First, simplify the routine and ensure your child understands exactly what is being asked of them.

Next, post the schedule in a clear location – on the refrigerator, for example –  with simple to follow directions.

Start with mealtimes, homework time, and bedtime. Add on other parts as your child becomes settled into a basic routine.

Consistency is critical. Each day the expectations ought to be the same, as much as possible.

Allow your child to be part of the routine creation. They can suggest the order of their after-school schedule. Of course be ready to gently guide them to an appropriate schedule.

Provide positive reinforcement. It could be verbal praise or even a monetary reward if the routine is followed correctly.

Lastly, praise the effort! Even if your child fails at following the routine, compliment what they did do right. Perhaps they got home, had their snack, then began homework, but it was too difficult or they did not understand what to do. Offering praise for the effort is huge and deposits money into the good will bank.

When to implement routines

The three times of day that benefit the most from an established routine are in the morning before school, in the afternoon after school, and at bedtime. A key component to the success of routines is keeping the same order of activities, according to Raising Children Network.

Morning routines ought to include:

Parent “Me Time.” Provide yourself – the parent – with 10 to 15 minutes of me time before the kids get up. This time can offer you an opportunity to complete a quick yoga practice or mindful mediation or to simply enjoy a cup of coffee with your spouse. Bonus: sensitive kids can pick up on your stress so it is even more important that you relax before you encounter the kids in the morning.

Eat a healthy breakfast. Depending on the age of your kids, you may need to still be chef and wait staff. Starting the day with a healthy meal can launch your child’s day with a smile and optimism to handle another day of learning and growing.

Proper hygiene. Kids may need reminders about brushing teeth and washing hands. Make sure these seemingly obvious steps are in your posted morning routine.

Eliminate morning electronics. This means no television or phone use. Kids, especially neurodivergent ones, will frequently gravitate to electronics as a way to appease boredom. Or simply out of bad habit. This will derail them from getting dressed and or brushing their teeth. 

Ensure lunch is packed. Frequently this can be accomplished the night before, but ensure your child has his lunch packed before you leave the house.

Homework and necessary items are packed. Like lunch, this step can be completed the night before, but either way backpacks need to be packed and ready with computers, homework and any other necessary items.

Afternoon routines ought to include:

Snack. Depending on your child’s schedule, they may have eaten lunch early in the day and are ravenous upon arriving home. Because you control the food pipeline in your home, ensure there is a variety of healthy snack options.

Homework time. Yes, your child knows she must complete her homework, but a good routine specifies what time and where in the house this is will occur. Generally, the earlier the better. Waiting until 8:00 pm to start homework is never a good idea, no matter what age your child is!

Physical activity/movement. If your child plays a sport, this step may be unnecessary. However, for the majority of kids, they need to get the CDC’s recommended 60 minutes of exercise per day. If your child has ADHD/ADD then this becomes critical! Whether your family is blessed with a big beautiful backyard or you need to hike it to a nearby park, encourage your child to get out and get moving. They are more likely to agree and enjoy this if other kids are present.

Downtime. A good after-school routine ought to include some downtime. This means no electronics. Your child could listen to music (yes, this is electronics but not screen time), read a book, write in a journal (about what a wonderful parent you are for creating this routine), or just daydream; there is power in doing nothing.

Free time. Of course, every kid just wants to get home form school and have the rest of the afternoon and evening to themselves. After all they have been tortured – we mean learning – all day in school. Business before pleasure is an enduring idiom for a reason, and it is never too early to begin teaching this concept to your child.

Bedtime routines should include:

A consistent bedtime and wake up time. Good sleep hygiene starts with a set bedtime and consistent wake up time. Encouraging your child to adopt these routines will benefit both their physical and mental health.

Brushing teeth and putting on pajamas. Most children are not wired to want to brush their teeth. This practice must be established and part of a nightly pre-bed routine.

Read-aloud story. Younger children – up through elementary school- typically enjoy listening to a story before bed. As a bonus: research shows that reading aloud can improve school performance!

Quiet time. This could include reading a book, coloring, and or working on a puzzle.

Reinforcement and kind words. Ending the day with a hug and or kiss sends the message to your child that they are loved and cared for. Offer a compliment about their day and or some positive affirmation that helps your child feel safe and secure.

Final thoughts

Certain times of the year are ripe to start new habits. New Year’s Day and our birthdays are two obvious examples. For children, the beginning of the school year is one of these fertile times of the year when routines and new habits are likely to take root and grow, with the right nourishment. As we have emphasized, it is the repetition of good daily habits that separates the successful from the those that languish in mediocrity and/or unfulfilling results. By helping your child to develop a before school, after school and bed time routine, you are setting them up for success not only in school but for the rest of their lives. 

If you or your child struggle with developing or following a routine, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how an Executive Functions coach could work with your child to teach these critical skills.

How much summer learning is necessary for children? And how to achieve the Goldilocks amount to keep your child from suffering the Summer Slide. 

School has been out for about a month and many parents may be looking for easy-to-prepare academic activities the kids can do to help offset the dreaded “summer slide.” The trick of course is finding activities that have genuine educational value that your child will actually want to do. That’s where Engage the Brain comes in. We have scoured the Internet and curated the best reading, writing, and math activities that your child will enjoy.

Why summer learning is important

Summer is a bridge between school years. Make it a scenic and enjoyable crossing by selecting high value and high interest activities that your child will take to. By engaging in appropriate learning activities, your child will stave off the summer slide, which is the regression of skills during the summer months. Read more about it here. 

The questions often raised are: how much learning must my child do to maintain his skills? Is it possible to actually make progress and get ahead during the summer? If so, how?

How much summer learning is necessary?

Most families are looking for the Goldilocks effect: just the right amount of learning to keep skills sharp but not overwork the child so that they become recalcitrant, rebellious, or burnt out.

So how much is the right amount?

Governor’s Early Literacy Foundation reports that children need to read six books during the summer to maintain or improve their reading skills. This could be broken down into daily reading sessions of 20 to 30 minutes, with a mixture of nonfiction, fiction, and online media.

Kids may like reading more than you would think. Nearly 60 percent of children ages 6 to 17 say they love or like reading books for fun a lot, and 52 percent think it’s extremely or very important, according to the Scholastic Kids and Family Reading Report.

According to Dr. Rick N. Bolling, a superintendent at Bath County, Public Schools in Virginia, “One thing is certain: lengthy workbook/skill practices are not innovative and do little to prevent  the summer slide. Instead, learning should be viewed as a continuous journey. Just like in athletics, skills need continual practice to become highly successful.” He goes on to say that sessions ought to be short so as not to overwhelm and lose student interest.

Of course a great way to soak in summer learning is by enrolling your child in a summer camp that combines academics and fun. One such program is Summer Smarts, hosted by expert Learning Specialists.

However, if you are looking for less formal options, that’s where our curated list comes in! The activities are broken down into reading, math, and writing activities. They truly are a la carte, so bring them to your child and allow them to pick and choose which one(s) look like fun.

Reading activities

Create a cozy reading nook in your home. Sometimes all it takes to get kids reading is a little imagination. Whether in the living room or in a bedroom, create a cozy reading area adorned with comfy pillows and blankets. Of course it needs enough light to see the pages! 

Form a family book club. Have everyone in the family, including parents, join in to read an agreed upon book. Does your family prefer fiction or nonfiction? Set up weekly discussions to share insights about the book, and come up with a catchy name for your family book discussions.

Join a summer reading challenge. Most public libraries offer some version of a challenge for children during the summer months. Often times prizes are awarded for achieving a certain amount of pages read. This could be the motivator your child needs!

Make regular trips to the library. By creating a routine where you go to the library each week kids have the motivation to read and select new books each week. And it is free! As bonus: they can check up on the Reading Challenge they joined!

Incentivize reading. Of course we want children to develop intrinsic motivation, but if your child is a reluctant reader, then offer to bribe, we mean pay them. Set up a reasonable payment plan for each book read.

Get hands-on with science experiments. Encourage your child to read a science book and then conduct an experiment. A good suggestion is The Everything Kids’ Science Experiment Book by Tom Robinson, which uses simple, everyday items typically found around the house. Some are messy but not dangerous!

Math activities

Go on a shape scavenger hunt. As you walk your neighborhood, perhaps with your pet pooch,  challenge your child to see how many different shapes they can find. For example, a Stop sign is an octagon and a Yield sign is a triangle.

Hold a Measurement Olympics. Head out to your backyard, if big enough, or to a nearby park. Encourage your child to throw either a baseball or a football and then figure out how to measure how far the ball traveled. Repeat this but this time kick the ball. Maybe bring a tape measure or a ruler or yardstick. Determining how to measure the distance is part of the learning process. Using a stop watch – most smartphones have one in the clock app – time your child running certain distances. This can introduce a discussion about decimals.

Estimation challenges. If your family is headed somewhere on vacation, ask your child to estimate the mileage. Are you driving or flying? Challenge them to make their best estimate in how long it will take to get to your destination. Even just a mundane trip to the market can become a family estimation challenge. Who can come closest to estimating the total cost of the grocery bill? Encourage your child to round prices to the nearest dollar to help make their predictions.

Hopscotch Math. The traditional game of hopscotch lends itself to different math activities. After you draw the basic outline for the game, decide what skill you would like your child to work on. For example, in each box you could place a multiplication fact that your child must solve when they land in that box. Another option is to record fractions in each box, and when your child lands in a section they must announce an equivalent fraction. And yet another option is to place a decimal in each section and when your child lands in a box they must either read the decimal or offer an equivalent fraction. The math possibilities are endless!

Play board games. Board games are a wonderful way to sneak in some math practice. Any game that involves rolling dice and or keeping score naturally involves math. In some games the math is more overt, such as Monopoly, while in other games such as Qwirkle the math is “hidden” within the fun of the game. As a bonus your child can also fine tune their Executive Functions skills while playing games by thinking about strategy and planning out the best way to win the game.

Get cooking. Cooking has so many great math skills. Everything from fractions in the recipe to temperature of the oven to elapsed time to cook the item, not to mention reading comprehension. Because stoves and ovens can be dangerous for younger children, a parent will need to assist in the kitchen. So pick a family favorite food, plan out the ingredients, and start cooking!

Writing activities

Practicing writing during the summer has multiple benefits, including reinforcing skills such as grammar, spelling, vocabulary, and sentence structure.

Send a Pen Pal Letter. A great way to get kids to write is to set up a Pen Pal. Perhaps a grandparent living in another state – or even across town – could be summoned to write back. Whether you choose “new school” and send an email, or “old school” and send a handwritten letter, either way your child is drafting and forming sentences and cohesive thoughts.

Write an original play script. Kids are creative. Some love to play with Lego figures and other childhood staples, while other children like to make their own characters, such as sock puppets. Either way, encourage them to develop a story script and to write it down. Maybe use an existing story for inspiration then put their own spin on the plot. Like the pen pal activity, scripts can be handwritten or placed into the electronic world on a Google doc. Either way is a win for writing!

Make an original greeting card. Perhaps you have a future Hallmark card writer, waiting to creatively express a common sentiment. With some simple supplies like card stock in assorted colors and markers and or crayons, challenge your child to create their own greeting card with appropriate message. Birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, all deserve recognition.

Create their own Mad Lib. Mad libs are those fun short stories that having missing words that a person supplies, based on requests like a plural noun or a verb in ing form that ultimately turn out funny. Kids will love writing these and as a bonus will be reviewing the parts of speech.

Write a new ending to a favorite story. Sometimes, kids just need a nudge to write. After reading or re-reading a favorite story, challenge your child to come up with a different ending to the story.

Respond to a writing prompt. Prodigy has some great writing prompts that your child can choose to respond to. What’s even better is the prompts are divided by elementary, middle, and high school level and by type: creative, persuasive, etc. Challenge your child to respond to one each day.

Final thoughts

Summer and learning do not need to be a binary option for kids: either all fun or all learning. By selecting entertaining and sneaky educational activities, your chid can have the best of both options. Striving for the Goldilocks amount of learning, which ought to include reading, writing, and math activities, during the summer will keep your child’s brain active and the Summer Slide away.

If you struggle to find educational activities for your child or they simply do not want to engage in learning during the summer, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how a Learning Specialist could motivate your child by presenting quality, research-backed materials that are both fun and educational.

What are the benefits of continuing your child’s learning during the summer? And what are some easy and effective ways to do it?

Parents, you made it! The last day of school came, and all the stress of the school year magically disappeared. No more homework battles. No more telling Tanya to put her tuba in the Toyota. No more complaints from your child about the healthy lunch you planned and prepared. But, now you are faced with two months of unstructured time to fill, all while trying to be budget-conscious about camps and vacations, and most importantly, your own sanity.

Intuitively, you know you should continue your child’s learning over the summer. How do you do that without reigniting all of those school year battles? By following our plan presented below. 

What follows are a few words about the Summer Slide and why it is absolutely real. Then some research on the benefits of summer learning. And finally, some easy ways to promote learning over the summer months.

The summer slide 

According to a study conducted by NWEA, students in grades 3rd through 8th lose about 20 percent of their school year gains in reading and 27 percent of math gains. Beyond looking at formal studies, common sense would suggest any student who does not engage in any academic pursuits – reading, writing, or math – for two straight months will regress or lose some of the gains made during the past school year. If you stop exercising for two entire months, are you going to be in the same shape you were in when you resume working out? Of course not. 

Another way to look at this is by asking educators what they see in their classrooms when students return the following fall. According to a survey conducted by Progress Learning, only 31 percent of teachers report that students retained the material taught the previous school year. Which is why the first month back in school is often spent reviewing last year’s material.

Of course pandemic related learning loss is still a consideration. Many students simply shut down during remote learning and are still catching up to where they ought to be. Studies and statistics vary by state, student age/grade and socioeconomic class, but it is clear a majority of students are still behind due to lingering effects of the pandemic.

However, the summer slide is not inevitable! A study by the research firm Kappan found that 22 percent of students actually made gains during the summer. How? By keeping children active in learning environments.

 5 Benefits of summer learning

Catch up on key skills. Some classes are just more difficult than others for certain students. Summer is a great time to revisit these key concepts and to ensure proficiency before the next school year. Online resources such as Khan Academy can be used.

Learn a new skill. Summer is a wonderful time for your child to explore a topic of their interest. Facilitate their passion by supporting trips to the local library – or book store – to find books or other research materials. Reading is reading, so encourage them to dive deep into this topic.

Makes transition back to school in the fall easier. Students who simply shut down academics over the summer will undoubtedly have a more challenging time returning to school in the fall. Their Executive Functions skill of shifting has been idle for two months, and shifting back into a structured school schedule and environment could be difficult. Conversely, those children who have kept some semblance of a schedule over the summer and continued learning will seamlessly return to school in the fall.

Explore Enrichment opportunities. Some students have passions that simply (and sadly) get ignored during the school year due to lack of time. Summer is a fantastic time of year for your child to dive deep into their interest. For example, if your child is fascinated by pirates, encourage them to learn more. Whether guiding them to your local library or museum, if appropriate, or just assisting with online searches that lead to “rabbit holes” of pirate informational booty, your encouragement is critical to their success.

Strengthen parent-child relations. Let’s be honest – parenting during the school year can be stressful and challenging. Homework battles, projects that creep up – or you learn about – at the last minute, sports practices that have rotating schedules, etc. Sometimes parents lose patience and children, even young ones, can detect the stress. Summer offers an opportunity for you to support your child’s interests in a less demanding way. There are no grades! Rekindle special relationships by focusing on what your child likes to learn about and both enjoy the journey to new knowledge.

7 Ways to foster summer learning

There are an unlimited number of ways to support your child’s summer learning. One caveat: plunking a few worksheets in front of your kid and expecting the summer slide to slip away will not work. This is especially true in math. A Harvard study states that worksheets alone will not stave off learning loss. Rather students must engage in problem-solving and applying the concepts. Below are some suggestions on how to best position your child for a productive summer of learning.

Find a formal summer program. Most towns have a plethora of summer programs. Of course they are not all created equal. One great option is Summer Smarts, presented by Engage the Brain. Summer Smarts is a series of week long academic camps with a particular themed focus, taught by Learning Specialists. Themes range from Greek Gods to Minecraft Adventures to History Mysteries. Camps are offered on a weekly basis so your child can pick the one(s) that interests them.

Volunteer with a local organization. Depending on the age of your child, they may be required to accumulate a certain number of service hours for graduation. Volunteering during the summer is a wonderful way to give back and chip away at the required hours. And, your child will be practicing their Executive Functions skills. For example, time management and planning will be necessary when they receive the schedule of when they are to be at a particular location. If there is any fundraising going on, of course they are now applying the math concepts referred to above.

Cooking. Encourage your child to select a recipe and start cooking. Of course many recipes are loaded with fractions: 1/2 cup of this, 1/4 cup of that, etc. and elapsed time. What time will the peanut butter cookies be done? Most kids will need your support with hot stoves and ovens, so pick a day when you have enough time to properly complete a family favorite recipe.

Create a board game. Many kids have played board games such as Monopoly or Sorry or Candy Land. Encourage them to make their own game. With easy-to-obtain supplies such as construction paper, markers, pens, and or crayons, challenge your kids to develop a game that the whole family can play. Maybe they “borrow” ideas from existing games and add a new twist. 

Join a public library reading challenge. Many public libraries hold reading activities and challenges for school age children during the summer. The Maitland (Florida) library offers one such example. Prizes are awarded by minutes read, which can be tracked on a reading log. There is even a challenge for adults!

Take a virtual tour and or check out museum exhibits. While in-person visits to local museums are usually the best for kids, the rest of the world is out there waiting to be explored virtually. Without leaving the comfort of your home and your child’s favorite chair in the family room, you could explore the Grand Canyon, The Great Barrier Reef, or The National Museum of Natural History.Your destination is only limited by your imagination.

Plant a garden. There are so many great skills and learning opportunities involved in preparing, planting and caring for a garden. If your backyard is not conducive to growing a crop or two, many towns have “community gardens” where residents may use a section to grow items of their choice. This is a summer long – or perhaps longer – activity, so be sure to discuss the commitment necessary for the garden to succeed.

Final thoughts

Like so many things in life, the answer to how your child can have a great summer is balance. No, parents do not need to keep a strict 7-hour school day-like schedule going with hourly lessons written down for child to dutifully complete while you are at work each day. As silly as that sounds, the antithesis of this is also true, meaning you cannot shut down academics altogether for two straight months and expect your child to waltz back into a classroom in August and be ready to go. 

Clearly there is a middle ground that will fend off the Summer Slide and allow your child some flexibility and creativity in how they read, write, work with numbers, and ultimately learn over the summer. Whether your child attends a formal summer program, joins a library reading challenge, or heads out on virtual expeditions, reading texts, writing something down and working with numbers in a more problem-solving capacity is their ticket to a productive and balanced summer.

If your child struggles with engaging in academics over the summer, or you have difficulty creating meaningful activities for child to engage in, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how a Learning Specialist may be able to work with your child to develop a personal learning plan that promotes all the critical literacy skills necessary for classroom success.

How do you help your child stay motivated at the end of the school year? By following this carefully cultivated list of strategies and techniques.

It is the beginning of May, and in Florida the end of the school year is only about a month away. And the end of the school year can bring mixed emotions to parents: dread because you have to figure out what to do with your child for two months; relief because homework battles and school projects will be placed on pause; pride because your child had a great year; or a weird combination of all these that swirl around simultaneously.

Whatever you are feeling, hopefully we can agree that you want your child to finish this school with motivation and zeal towards learning. How on Earth can you accomplish this, when your child may be halfway checked out and in the throes of spring fever? By following our carefully cultivated checklist!

High priority tasks

Maintain their self-care: This includes eating a proper diet, getting enough exercise – 60 minutes per day of moderate to vigorous exercise, according to the CDC, and getting adequate sleep – 9 to 11 hours, according to The National Sleep Foundation.

Stick to routines:  Psychology Today encourages parents to stick to consistent routines, which build self-confidence and self-control, both of which can waver this time of year. These routines ought to include homework times after school, chores and responsibilities, and consistent bedtimes.

Contact your child’s teacher(s) asking for academic areas to focus on this summer and for next school year. Summer is a great time to address any academic issues due to school being out; your child may be less stressed, not having to worry about classwork and or homework. 

Help your child prioritize end-of-year tasks. If your child has Executive Functions deficiencies, then they will struggle to determine what they need to do and when. Assist them with creating a study schedule for final exams or any long term projects. Breaking down these seemingly large assignments into smaller, more manageable steps will allow your child to complete them and not freeze or avoid the task altogether. One good suggestion is to use a physical calendar and to place test dates, project due dates, spring concerts, etc, on it so all responsibilities are in one place. Keep this in a high-visibility location, such as the kitchen. Refer to it and review it daily.

Use reminder tools such as phone apps, alarms, and/or checklists to remind children about what they should be working on. Understood has some great suggestions for students with ADHD.

Maintain a tidy homework space. As the year whips by, this area can become disorganized with old papers, siblings’ items, snack remnants, etc. Keep the space inviting, clean, and organized.

Refresh their supplies. Sometimes a new binder, a set of pens, and or a mechanical pencil can magically inject a new motivational force in your child. As the school year creeps to a close, school supplies can become ragged, so offer to update the different implements and you may see a new level of enthusiasm for learning from your child.

Set weekly attainable goals – Examples could be to turn in all homework on time for the week or to earn a 90 or higher on a spelling test.

Less obvious but still important tasks

Continue to ask your child questions about school and keep it a priority in your home. He may say there is nothing going on in class the last few weeks, but the teacher will disagree! Often times teachers are previewing next year’s benchmarks and or implementing projects, all certainly important for your child.

Create a reward system – In a perfect world your child would be internally motivated, which can be defined as engaging in an activity because of the inherent satisfaction and enjoyment of doing it. On the other hand, external motivation is defined when an external reward, such as money or praise, is linked to completing the activity. As the school year winds down, even the most motivated kids may need a nudge with an external motivator such as extra electronics time or cash for a grade on a project. You know your child best. Pick something they would be willing to work for.

Employ a study buddy. The saying misery loves company rings true in completing school work. Students who think and learn differently may like having someone to sit with them. This could be a parent, conveniently nearby to answer questions, or a sibling or peer who is completing similar work. 

Help your child make a list of all their successes from this school year. It could be academic- such as learning multiplication facts- or more social- such as making a new friend. This helps build metacognition, which gets them thinking about thinking.

Encourage your child to make their teacher a card with a short thank you message. This helps build gratitude, a shield for mental health.

Set up summer tutoring and/or other therapies. Good practitioners fill up quickly, so plan to connect and book early.

Arrange summer camps and extracurricular activities. Reminding your child that these fun activities are waiting for them can also motivate your child to finish the school year strongly.

Ease anxiety. If your child is anxious about the end of the year, or if next year is a big transition such as going from elementary to middle school or middle school to high school – talk with your child about their fears and concerns. Validate the feelings! Johns Hopkins Medicine recommends visiting the new school to help alleviate some of your child’s angst.

Prop up their strengths. Kids who think and learn differently often have experienced less success in the classroom compared to their neurotypical peers. Train a spotlight on your child’s strengths, whatever they are. If your child is an amazing guitarist, encourage and help them to find outlets for their passion. Do they want lessons? Can they get together with classmates who play an instrument and have a jam session? School and academics are still important, but continue to build up your child’s talents, too.

Final thoughts

Parenting school age kids is difficult and with summer in squinting view it is tempting to take your foot off the proverbial parental gas pedal. Don’t. Continue to implement all of these research-backed strategies, like sticking to routines, encouraging self-care, and maintaining an interest in their assignments and schoolwork.

If your child struggles with motivation and/or Executive Functions skills like planning, prioritizing, and time management, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how an Executive Functions coach could help your child develop a skillset to tackle these end-of-the-year challenges.

Why do schools still give standardized tests? What are the types of tests given? And what should parents do once they receive the results?

It is standardized test season – though it seems like they are given year round now – and time for the education experts to announce their best test-named acronyms, such as MAP, SAT, and BEST.  

Some of our students’ favorite education acronyms over the years have included: 

SCHOOL – Sucking Children’s Happiness Out Of Life 

MATH – Mental Abuse to Humans 

and 

HOMEWORK – Half Of My Energy Wasted On Random Knowledge

But seriously, even the phrase standardized test can conjure up different emotions. So before we go any further, let’s agree on a description. According to Forbes, “Standardized tests are used to set national and state policy for education reform, inform local decision-making, identify accountability measures, and make decisions regarding resource allocation.”

Types of standardized tests

There are two main types of standardized tests: criterion and norm-referenced. 

Criterion-based testing is essentially the student versus the content. In theory every student taking the test could earn a high score or demonstrate mastery. A state driver’s license exam or end of school year state education tests given to students would be examples.

Norm-referenced testing is comparative and ranks students against each other. It is the test taker versus the test taker sitting next to them. Only 1% of students can score in the 99 percentile. The college application exams SAT and ACT would be popular examples.

Narrowing our focus more locally to Florida, public school students in the Sunshine State take several criterion-based standardized tests. One is called the FAST:

Florida Assessment of Student Thinking (FAST) 

• A standardized test in English Language Arts (ELA) and Mathematics for grades VPK–10
• Administered three times per year to monitor student progress
• Aligned with the Benchmarks for Excellent Student Thinking (B.E.S.T.) Standards

Another set of tests for Floridian students are the EOCs or End-of-Course assessments:

• Computer-based assessments that measure student performance in specific courses
• Include assessments in Algebra 1, Algebra 2, and Geometry

According to the Florida Department of Education:

“The EOC assessments are designed to measure student achievement of the specified standards for middle and high-school level courses in Mathematics (Algebra 1, Geometry), Science (Biology 1), and Social Studies (Civics and U.S. History).”

As one could imagine, this is a lot of data collection and assessment of students. Is it all necessary?

Why give standardized tests?

Grades are not always an accurate reflection of student performance. Ed Week reports that in the period from 2018 to 2021 standardized test scores on the ACT dropped while over the same time frame student GPA increased. Why? Grading methodology varies from teacher to teacher and grades themselves tend to include a “mix of non-academic factors, such as student behavior, class participation, and extra credit,” according to the Ed Week article. It goes on to state that grade inflation has continued since the pandemic.

Here are some common arguments for and against their use:

Arguments for standardized test use:

• Universal standard that all students are assessed against the same criteria
• Accountability and data collection
• Identifying trends over time
• Identifying areas for improvement in either curriculum materials, teaching strategies, or both

Arguments against their use:

• Narrows the curriculum – tests do not cover everything
• Inaccurate measure of student learning – some students simply do not test well
• Stress and anxiety on both the students and teachers
• Focus on test preparation, which can take massive amounts of instructional time

Of course we would be remiss if we did not mention the Opt-Out movement, which gained the most momentum in the mid-2010s and still has support. Reasons a parent may opt their child out of standardized testing include concern over the stress it places on the student and the heavy emphasis placed on these single results to assess a child. 

What to do once parents receive their child’s standardized test score

Once the results arrive from a standardized test there several steps a parent should take. 

First, talk with your child’s teacher to understand their context and what the scores actually mean. Do the test results reflect the grades your child has been earning this school year? In other words, if your child scores well on the test and they have been receiving As and Bs, it would seem the results match up. However, if your child has been receiving As and Bs and they do poorly on the test, then follow up questions are needed. The teacher ought to be able to supply some of the information.

Next, understand the purpose of the test. Was it to track progress? Identify areas for intervention? To inform instruction? Of course the teacher ought be able to provide these answers, too.

Finally, look for patterns in your child’s score over time. Has your child always struggled on standardized tests? Is there a sudden worsening of performance? 

10 Essential life skills that standardized tests do not assess

Whether your child is a top test taker or struggles to perform on assessments, there are many critically important life skills that are not assessed on standardized tests. Engage the Brain encourages parents to continuously teach and promote these skills:

• Empathy – how your child can relate to others from their point of view
• Positive body language: sit up, make eye contact, nod to signal understanding…
• How to handle money and understand the value of it.
• Arrive on time – to school, a job, a sports practice, etc.
• How to handle stress and anxiety
• Healthy habits and self-care: diet, sleep and exercise
• How to do a load of laundry properly
• How and when to self-advocate and or communicate – face to face, email, text, phone call.
• Being coachable and adopting a growth mindset
• Possessing a positive attitude and cultivating optimism

Final thoughts

Standardized tests are a fact of life for most K-12 students. Knowing the format and purpose of the exam is important for parents to begin to truly understand the results. Whether the test is a mid-year check, an end of year cumulative assessment, or college entrance exam, knowing the function of the test will help place the results in better context. And of course your child’s teacher ought to be able to provide any necessary information about the standardized tests administered by them in their classroom. And remember: the most important skills are not assessed on standardized tests!

If your child struggles with standardized test taking – or even taking tests in general – contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how a Learning Specialist could help your child adopt critical thinking skills and test taking strategies that could help them improve on their assessment performance.

Why Failure is the Best Teacher

Children and students often view failure as something to be feared. However, failure is not the end of the road—it is a stepping stone to success. At Engage the Brain, we believe that failure is learning, and when students embrace failure, they unlock their true potential.

In this article, we will explore why failure is good for children, how setbacks create opportunities for growth, and ways to cultivate a positive mindset toward mistakes. We’ll also share expert insights and practical strategies for students to turn failure into a powerful learning experience.

The Science Behind Learning from Failure

Understanding the Growth Mindset

Dr. Carol Dweck, a renowned psychologist, introduced the concept of a growth mindset, where intelligence and abilities are not fixed but develop through effort and perseverance. Children with a growth mindset see failure as an opportunity to learn rather than a sign of incompetence.

How the Brain Learns from Mistakes

Research shows that when students make mistakes, their brains form new neural connections, strengthening cognitive abilities. This means that failure rewires the brain for better learning outcomes.

Why Failure is Good for Students

1. Encourages Resilience

Failure teaches children to bounce back from challenges. Instead of giving up, they develop perseverance, which is essential for academic and life success.

2. Builds Problem-Solving Skills

When students encounter setbacks, they must analyze what went wrong and find new solutions. This enhances their critical thinking and adaptability.

3. Fosters Creativity and Innovation

Some of the greatest inventors and scientists—like Thomas Edison and Albert Einstein—failed multiple times before achieving breakthroughs. Failure pushes students to think outside the box and explore different approaches.

4. Prepares Students for Real-World Challenges

Life is full of obstacles, and learning to handle failure early prepares children for future career and personal challenges. Resilient students are more likely to succeed in competitive environments.

Embracing Failure: Strategies for Students

1. Reframe Failure as a Learning Opportunity

Instead of seeing failure as defeat, students should ask, “What can I learn from this experience?” Encouraging reflection helps them move forward with a better strategy.

2. Develop a Positive Internal Dialogue

Negative self-talk (e.g., “I’m not smart enough”) can hinder growth. Instead, students should practice positive affirmations, like “I am learning and improving.”

3. Set Realistic Goals and Celebrate Progress

Small wins build confidence. By setting achievable milestones, students can track their progress and stay motivated.

4. Learn from Role Models

Many successful individuals faced failure before reaching success. Parents and educators can share stories of famous figures who turned setbacks into achievements.

5. Encourage a Supportive Learning Environment

Parents, teachers, and tutors should foster an environment where mistakes are seen as part of the learning process. A nurturing atmosphere allows students to take risks without fear of judgment.

Common Concerns About Failure

Does Failure Lower Self-Esteem?

Failure can be discouraging, but only if it is not framed positively. When students receive constructive feedback and encouragement, they build resilience instead of self-doubt.

How Can Parents Help Children Handle Failure?

Parents should model a healthy attitude toward failure. Instead of criticizing mistakes, they should ask their children, “What did you learn from this?” and support them in trying again.

Key Takeaways: Turning Setbacks into Success

• Failure is learning—mistakes help students develop new skills and knowledge.
• A growth mindset enables children to embrace challenges and improve through effort.
• Resilience, problem-solving, and creativity all stem from overcoming failures.
• Supportive parents, teachers, and tutors play a crucial role in shaping a child’s perception of failure.
• Every setback is an opportunity to learn, adapt, and grow.

For more insights on helping your child succeed through failure, check out our previous article: Give Your Child the Gift of Failure.

Final Thoughts

At Engage the Brain, we help students develop confidence and learning strategies to turn failures into successes. If your child struggles with setbacks, our expert tutors can provide the guidance they need. Contact us today to learn more about our personalized tutoring programs and how we can help your child thrive!

*Carol Dweck’s Growth Mindset Research

Social media sites have changed the rules for minors. What does the law say? And what are the benefits and dangers of social media to kids?

The words social media conjure up a variety of thoughts and feelings depending on who is asked. On the positive end, some may say social media allows them to stay connected with family and friends who live far away and participate in online communities not available near by. On the negative end, others may share tales of critical and hurtful comments or encountering objectionable content. Wherever you stand on social media and its place in society, children live a different existence online, and some legal changes that went into effect recently may alter young people’s access to and use of social media sites.

First, let’s agree on what social media is. 

According to Investopedia, social media refers to a variety of technologies that facilitate the sharing of ideas and information among their users. The sites typically feature user-generated content that lends itself to engagement via likes, shares, comments, and discussion. Some popular social media sites include Facebook, X (formerly Twitter), Instagram, TikTok and Youtube. (More on those later.)

In the state of Florida, as of January 1st, 2025, CBS News reports the minimum age to create an account is now 16. However, 15 year olds may either keep or start one with parental or guardian permission. Additionally, the law requires the sites to essentially terminate the accounts of existing minors. There are lawsuits currently filed that are challenging the law’s constitutionality. 

Of course kids can lie and set their birthdate on the log-in site as “16,” but then when their reported birthday turns 18 the companies are free to sell their data. As someone said, data mining is the new oil.

What follows is an exploration of social media habits of kids, some of the potential dangers and benefits kids face while on the sites, and finally, some popular sites many children spend time on.

Amount of time kids spend on social media

The numbers, frankly, are frightening! According to a Gallup survey, time spent on social media sites breaks down like this: 

4.1 hours per day for 13-year-olds and 5.8 hours per day for 17-year-olds. Girls tend to spend an hour more per day than boys on social media. Youtube and TikTok are the most popular sites along with Instagram. 

These are averages, meaning some kids are spending much higher amounts of time on these sites than these numbers!

Do the math for a high school student: 7 hours in school + 8 hours (allegedly) sleeping + 6 hours on social media = 21 hours. That leaves 3 hours for homework, chores, part-time job, sports or other extracurricular activities. A huge complication is 31% of time spent on social media stems from what the researchers describe as “self-control problems.” Think of the Executive Function skill of emotion regulation! Many kids simply are failing at controlling their time on these sites.

Kids need guidance and coaching using the Internet and learning how to be good digital citizens. Common Sense Media reports: “If a caregiver is involved in a teen’s digital life, preps them for how to handle negative online situations, talks about protecting privacy and being kind, it can go a long way toward a more positive social media experience.”

Dangers of social media for kids

One cannot overstate the potential danger that exists in the online world. Seemingly all of the world’s children have retreated in to this realm, yet there is barely any oversight or protections built in. The social media media and tech companies are attempting to keep people online as long as possible through intricate algorithms. 

For children in particular, some dangers include:

Inappropriate content such as nudity, self-harm, and violence.

Cyberbullying, whichcan run rampant with no real enforcement or punishment. People are emboldened to write aggressive and hurtful things they may never utter in face-to-face situations.

Poor mental health such as depression and anxiety have been linked to excessive – more than 3 hours per day – social media use in teens. Paradoxically, the sites purport to connect and create community, but teens report loneliness as another negative side effect.

Risky behavior where kids may be tempted to send explicit texts, photos or videos thinking they are private.

Exposing their location if privacy settings are not correctly set, a child’s physical location can be found by individuals with bad intentions.

Positives of social media participation

Of course like most cases, there are two sides to each story. When used properly social media certainly can offer some benefits to children. The National Institutes for Health (NIH) states the positives can include:

Community Sites can provide positive community and connection with others who share identities, abilities, and interests, especially those traditionally marginalized groups.

Access to information Provides an entry to learning about topics of interest and a vast amount of information about those issues.

Self-expression Kids can post thoughts, art, videos to share with their community of friends.

Form and maintain social connections While it is not always possible for friends to spend time together, these sites provide the means to maintain friendships and updates.

Popular social media sites by age group 

Some parents may be well-versed on social media. For those that are not, here is a thumbnail sketch of some of the popular sites by age group:

Elementary age students

Zigazoo bills itself as the largest social media site for kids. It features moderation by humans – as opposed to an algorithm, positive and empowering content and a mission to provide youth with a safe and positive community.

Kinzoo Messenger is an app designed “for connection, creativity, and curiosity.” They purport to design the platform for connection, not to hook or keep kids on the app for extended periods of time.

Playkids + is focused on holistic development of kids. The platform promotes three areas of learning: interpersonal, where kids focus on respect and interacting in an appropriate manner; intrapersonal, in which kids learn about themselves, their feelings and emotions; and cognitive, where children learn how the world works.

Middle school age students

Girl2Girl Wall is a starter social media app for tween and teen girls ages 8-16. Like some of the other recommended apps the user-generated content is moderated by a human being. Content and conversations tend to revolve around young girl interests such as boys, make up, and cliques.

Lego Life is designed for Lego lovers, where they can share their creations and discover others’ designs. Lego offers themed challenges and contests with prizes! And like the others on here it is moderated.

Tik Tok for Kids is from the same popular app but is designed for kids 13 and under. Among some of the safety features is TikTok allegedly limits the amount of information gathered from these users. Of course it features videos of everything under the sun!

High school age students

Instagram is one of the more popular social media sites for teens and adults. Users can share photos and videos with their network, which others can like and or comment on. Content creators have access to editing tools such as filters and stickers to add creativity to their posts.

X (formerly Twitter) is a wildly popular site for people to share bite-sized thoughts, known as tweets, pictures, and videos. Like these other sites users can follow other members, like and comment on the posts. While there is monitoring by X, this is an adult site with language and videos featuring mature subjects. There are no parental controls, but there are privacy and safety settings that can help manage younger users’ feeds.

Tik Tok features short videos that people can share, comment on, and like. The app’s algorithm analyzes the users engagement and develops a personalized feed. Humor, dancing, and even educational content is featured.

Youtube is wildly popular among all age groups, which features a wide range of content from instructional videos to musical performances to comedy skits to television shows that are user created. 

Final thoughts

Social media is a relatively new construct that both kids and adults have taken to. At their best they offer connection, community, support, validation, and an outlet for expression. At their worst they hook people for hours, torpedo mental health, and allow some of the Internets nastiest residents to lurk. Governments have begun to address some concerns for children and these sites by limiting the age of access. Time will tell whether these age-based interventions will work.

The numbers don’t lie – kids are spending an enormous amount of time scrolling through the sites. Therefore, parents need a healthy understanding of how these site work, and it is critical parents and guardians guide children in best practices using social media sites. If your child struggles with self-control and spends hours on social media sites and or surfing the Internet, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to learn how an Executive Functions coach could help guide your child to make better choices with time management and control their emotion regulation.

Why should parents implement downtime in their child’s afternoon? Because research states they need it for their mental health and time to process new information.

Parents, looking for New Year’s resolutions for your child? Perhaps ask them to lay off the social media apps? Or suggest they get involved in an after school activity? How about they actually complete their chore after the first time you ask them to do it?! While all of these may lower your blood pressure and potentially be good for your child, may we suggest a simple resolution that is ironically difficult to pull off? Have them resolve to do nothing. 

That’s right… have them arrive home from school and do nothing! There is power in downtime, and research backs this up.

Why children should have downtime

First, what exactly is downtime? It is defined as a period of time for a person to relax, decompress, and recharge. There is neither a goal nor adult directed supervision or direction. 

Kids are under more pressure than ever. Between the rigorous requirements at school, managing the drama and intricacies of social life, and any extracurricular activities that they may participate in, the need for downtime is critical. Throw in shortened recess, increased homework (by well-meaning teachers), and schools still trying to make up for learning loss from the pandemic, and one can see the desire for a child to come home and just want to do nothing.

Because of all these assorted pressures, depression and anxiety continue to be concerns with children. According to the National Institutes of Health, nearly 20% of children and young people ages 3-17 in the United States have a mental, emotional, developmental, or behavioral disorder. What is driving these sad statistics? Many things, including: academic pressures, social concerns, body image, family issues, and future plans.

How do parents combat this? One tool to place in your parental toolbox ought to be demanding nothing. Or rather requiring your child to do nothing, for a period of time after school.

Breaks from structured activities reduce stress and recharge cognitive abilities. Paradoxically, it can increase productivity. According to Henry Ford Health, downtime boosts learning by providing time to process, consolidate and store information. Kids are bombarded with new information every day. They need time to process and catalog all this data.

Additionally, unstructured play allows kids to develop their imaginations and creativity. “Studies show kids that have regular downtime are more creative, focused, energized, independent, can self-soothe and solve problems in innovative ways,”  according to Dr. Hlavaty from Akron Children’s Hospital. What parent doesn’t want that for their child?

This does not mean there is no homework time or chores responsibility. It simply means built into your child’s after school routine is time for unwinding and decompression.

Suggestions for implementing downtime

Hopefully, you are convinced your child needs some downtime when they arrive home in the afternoon from school. What could that look like? Akron Children’s Hospital suggests 20 minutes of downtime for elementary age kids, 30 minutes for middle school, and up to an hour for high school students. Of course you know your child best and what they can reasonably handle, so treat these times as gentle suggestions.

Downtime suggestions include:

• Going outside and playing in the yard or nearby park

• Playing with blocks or Legos

• Creating with Play Dough

• Completing a jigsaw puzzle

• Coloring or drawing

• Journaling – Gratitude- The Life Blog has some great writing prompts 

• Enjoying music

• Chatting with family members

Please notice none of these suggestions include doom-scrolling through social media apps. That is certainly not downtime! While the above list is not exhaustive, the idea is simply to disconnect and recharge. Remember: According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, kids ages 8-12 spend 4-6 hours per day on devices. Teens can spend up to 9 hours per day! Kids need time away from screens, even if they are just playing a fun video game.

Final thoughts

New Year’s resolutions are notoriously challenging to keep. So this year we suggest you challenge your child to resolve to do nothing when they arrive home from school. Research backs up the concept of allowing your child to simply sit for a period of time, with no goal other than to relax and recharge. This provides the time for new concepts to be reflected on and filed away in the correct drawer in their brain. Paradoxically it will make your child more productive!

If your child struggles with after school routines or you are having a difficult time implementing this critical concept of downtime in your child’s schedule, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how an Executive Functions coach could help you and your child develop time management and prioritizing skills that will ensure downtime becomes a daily part of your child’s afternoon schedule.

Not sure what to get your child this Christmas? Give them the gift of failure. Research really backs this up.

This holiday season, we suggest you wrap up a new approach to parenting and give the gift of failure to your child. Why on earth would a parent do that?! A popular saying states that calm seas make poor sailors. That same sentiment could be extended to parenting, in that parents who refuse to allow their child to fail will never develop the proper skill set to handle adversity, when it inevitably arrives in the child’s life.

Parents, take a hard look in the mirror and reflect on your parenting style. Do you question teachers when your child receives/earns a low grade on a test or assignment? Do you help too much or even complete homework assignments? How about other areas of your child’s life? Most importantly, what message are you sending to your child? Is it unconditional love, or something more nefarious?

Why allowing failure is okay and actually encouraged

A Child Mind Institute study found that kids who were shielded from failure or were taught it is not acceptable were more likely to develop depression and anxiety later in life. Without realizing it, you are communicating a sense of hopelessness, that you cannot do this. 

Some parents adopt the mindset of tomorrow I will step back and let my child do _______. But tomorrow arrives and they still overprotect and bulldoze real and imagined obstacles. This ultimately leads to the psychiatric term enmeshment, which defines as a relationship dynamic where people’s personal boundaries are unclear, leading to a reduced sense of self and autonomy, according to New Haven Healing Families. This, unfortunately, yields unhappy parents and “failure-to-launch” kids who move back in with their parents after college when rough seas churn.

Many parents wrongly – but understandably – believe that a child’s failure is a reflection of themselves and their parenting ability. This has become increasingly difficult due, in part, to social media, with some parents posting ideal versions of their children happily accepting their scholarship offer from Harvard. Nobody posts on Instagram the F their 3rd grader received on the Friday spelling test! 

Remember that the word Fail = First attempt in learning.

What failure teaches

Thomas Edison famously failed 10,000 times to create a working light bulb. What if he gave up? I would be typing this by candlelight, but I digress! Seriously, failure teaches kids so much, including how to:

• Develop resiliency This is a skill that can be learned, a muscle that can be developed. Anecdotally, Engage the Brain sees many students who simply give up when a task becomes challenging. These students are “wounded learners,” and need opportunities to develop resiliency.

• Create self-efficacy Simply put this means developing a sense of competency, that a child believes he can complete a task. A child needs chances to demonstrate that he can successfully write a paragraph or change a bicycle tire. Out of failure comes creativity and a determination to try again.

• Learn to self-soothe and self-regulate When confronted with frustration and stress, some children melt down, especially those kids with thinking and learning differences. Children must be given the opportunities to experience disappointment and then coached and supported. Perhaps a breathing technique can be introduced or a brisk walk suggested to allow time to cool off.

• First hand experience There is no substitute for hands-on experience, no matter what the task. A child that has tried something and failed is light years ahead of the kid that has been sheltered and had everything handed to her. 

• Develop a growth mindset Adopting this attitude allows a person to grow and improve with effort and intention. A child with a growth mindset believes they control their ability to succeed through hard work and dedication.

What to do when your child fails

In the Time Magazine article How I Learned to Let My Kid Fail, it puts forth two important conditions. Failing is only productive when two things are true: first, the person who fails actually learns something from it and is thus motivated to try again, and second, the failure doesn’t permanently close future doors. With these two factors front and center, how can a parent best help their child deal with failure?

First, kids need time to reflect and receive feedback. The job of the parent is to offer support, not solutions. Use questions to guide your child to reflect on the failure. What did you learn from this? What went right? What went wrong? What can you try differently? 

A University of Virginia study found that sharing examples of failure helps kids understand it is a natural part of every day human actions. It actually strengthens their connection to their community and offered a sense of belonging. So offer examples of how you have failed and – equally important – how you responded to it.

Introduce the RAIN technique. Big Life Journal suggests using this acronym to help your child process failure – and the big emotions associated with it – by connecting mindfulness to resilience.

R – Recognize what is happening – What is going on? How do I feel?

A – Allow life to happen as it is – Let the thoughts and feelings hang even if they are uncomfortable.

I – Investigate with kindness – Why do I feel this way? Is this really true?

N – Non-identification – I am having this thought but I am not this emotion.

Finally, kids need opportunities to practice failing with low stakes activities. Board games and competitive sports are good places for this. Even after failing in a “low stakes” event, guide your child using questioning to help them develop this essential skillset.

Final thoughts

Many parents adopt a “failure-avoiding” parenting style to protect their child’s self-esteem. However, though this comes from a place of love and concern, it actually does way more harm than good. In the short term and long term. As the Children’s Health Council states, “ The older you are the first time you “fall,” the longer the drop and the harder the landing.” 

Help your child develop the life skills of how to handle failure. By learning how to cultivate resiliency, self-sooth, and develop a growth mind set, you are gifting your child a present they will never want to return. And it will be life altering! Because when they do fall, it will not be as far and the landing will be way softer.

If your child struggles with dealing appropriately with failure, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how an Executive Functions coach can help your child develop these essential life skills.