How do you help your child set and achieve goals? By following this 5 step plan and focusing on SMART goals.
As the ball drops in New York City’s Times Square with the strains of Auld Lang Syne fading in the background, and you begin the dreaded clean up of your New Year’s Eve celebration (maybe with a slight headache), many people begin the obligatory process of setting New Year’s resolutions. Improve diet, exercise more, and save more money are popular aspirations. And according to recent research, by the end of January over 60 percent of people will have already abandoned their resolutions.
Why is this case? Perhaps the simplest explanation is focusing on the difference between a resolution and a goal. A resolution is more general and a statement of hopeful change. I will join a gym in 2023 and begin working out. A goal has a specific target and steps to achieve it. I will work out three days a week for 45 minutes each day.
While many adults go through this annual ritual of resolution setting in early January, children can benefit from guided goal setting, too. According to PositivePsychology, encouraging your child to sift through a series of possible goals – and formulating a plan to achieve them – has great benefits including:
- improving self-image
- increasing awareness of strengths and weaknesses
- building responsibility
- improving decision making
- giving kids a lead role in their future
- providing a successful experience
In addition to these amazing perks, reflective self-improvement, also called a growth mindset, has been found to be a better predictor of future success than IQ.
But of course children need help with this process. Here is what research says are the best strategies to use to help your child set and achieve their goals.
SMART goals
Many people have heard of the acronym SMART when planning to set up some goals. SMART goals were developed by George Doran, Arthur Miller and James Cunningham in their 1981 article “There’s a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management goals and objectives.” Let’s break it down.
S: specific – goal is identified and has a specific purpose and benefit.
M: measurable – it can be deemed successful. I will achieve at least an 80% on weekly spelling tests.
A: attainable – your child can realistically achieve the goal. If your child is 8 years old, dunking a basketball on a ten foot high rim is not going to happen.
R: relevant – the goal has a clear connection to your child and he sees the benefit of it.
T: time-bound – there is timed part of the goal. I will earn at least an 80% on my weekly spelling tests for the 3rd quarter of school.
Choosing goals with your child
Right at the outset it is critical that your child select the goal. That doesn’t mean you cannot suggest and guide them to the best one. One way to do this is to employ the Three Stars and a Wish model, which is especially effective for younger children. Start by picking a category such as math or basketball and list three “stars,” or areas of strength and one “wish,” an area for improvement. The area for improvement may be a possibility for a goal.
Perhaps your child does well on math class assignments and homework but scores relatively low on tests. You could lead your child through the SMART goal steps to establish a goal to improve on the math tests.
Of course that leads us to types of goals. In short there are school-related or academic goals and non-school related goals, such as learning a new instrument. Each area has many fruitful possibilities. If selecting a school-based goal, ensure it meets all of the SMART goal steps and is something your child truly wants to accomplish. In the area of non-school or non-academic goals, guide your child to think about character goals such as caring, courtesy, and/or generosity. Again, it is imperative that your child want to achieve this goal if she is going to have a chance to be successful.
Steps to goal setting
Once you and your child have settled on an appropriate goal, it is time to plan it out. Having a sequence to follow is important so that your child can see the steps and ensure they are manageable and achievable.
- Select the goal: In addition to the above referenced ideas, ensure the goal is of the right challenge level – think attainable in the SMART goal acronym. Too easy and there is no payoff or growth. Too difficult and frustration will emerge and feelings of ineptitude could appear.
- Plan the steps: Your child will probably need lots of guidance during this step. Help your child work backwards from the goal and brainstorm all the steps that will be necessary to achieve it. Emphasize smaller, more manageable steps and realistic time frames to accomplish each step. Write these steps down and place them where they can be checked frequently and updated.
- Brainstorm any roadblocks: Most good and challenging goals will have set backs. Anticipating these – or as many as you can – will help prepare your child for the misstep. For example, if your child’s goal is to earn an 80% or higher on weekly spelling tests and she receives a 75%, plan what she could do differently. Perhaps she needs to write each word down three times AND have a parent quiz her nightly.
- Monitor and adjust as necessary: Because you generated possible roadblocks, this step is important in keeping your child on track. As the life span of the goal unravels, help your child evaluate what has gone well and what, if anything, needs adjusting. Perhaps it is a small tweak. In other cases there may need to be a major shift. Guide your child to determine what changes need to be or should be made.
- Celebrate both small and big successes: Please celebrate your child’s journey in goal setting. Whether he accomplishes the goal or not, point out any successes achieved along the way. For example, if your child’s goal was to earn a 90% or higher on math tests during the 3rd quarter and he ends up with a 84%, and that is an improvement over the 2nd quarter scores, celebrate! These celebrations will improve your child’s self-esteem and provide a boost of confidence that they can be successful in other parts of their life, too.
Final thoughts
As the calendar flips to January and a new year begins, encourage your child to set a goal in place of making a traditional New Year’s resolution. In addition to elevating their self-esteem and confidence in accomplishing other tasks, goal setting has the added bonus of boosting their Executive Functions, which includes time management, organization, and self-monitoring. While it is important that your child ultimately select the goal, parental guidance and feedback is critical to your child choosing one that meets the SMART goal parameters. And do not forget to model your own goal setting in either your personal or professional life. Your children are watching!
If your child struggles with setting and achieving goals or has an Executive Functions weakness, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discuss how a Learning Specialist could help your child develop the necessary skills.
There are many educational apps. Which are the best ones for elementary, middle and high school age students?
“Holy Shipt,” screamed Santa from his workshop. Mrs. Claus, within earshot and appalled, said, “Santa, language!”
“No, honey. Shipt is an app. They will deliver everything from food to drinks to toys. What is this world coming to? Next thing you know they won’t need me! Ho ho no!”
Mrs. Claus offered Santa some hot cocoa with extra marshmallows and encouraged him to sit down in his comfy chair. Rudolf, the emotionally intelligent reindeer, sat nearby with an eye on Santa hoping the cocoa would do the trick.
Some parents may now be feeling a lot like Santa. Most schools have gone digital, meaning every student is issued a laptop and most assignments are completed and submitted electronically. And with this relatively new way of schooling taking over – and here to stay – being proficient with learning management systems and apps is more important than ever.
But like most things in this digital world, some are better than others. Engage the Brain is here to help parents sift through the electronic world of educational apps and help offer some insights and guidance into the best ones for different age students.
Best apps for elementary age students
Khan Academy Kids is great for lower elementary age students. It has everything from math and English lessons to activities that can be printed. According to the website, the content was developed in collaboration with learning experts at Stanford and aligned with the Head Start Early Learning Outcomes Framework and Common Core Standards.
Prodigy is another great site for learning both language arts and math. They boast a big goal: to make every student love learning. A nice feature of Prodigy is it allows parents to track the progress of their child, which can motivate children to see how they are progressing through the skills. Both the math and language arts activities are set in story mode which can make it feel like playing a video game.
ABCmouse.com is a subscription based site. It offers a variety of learning skills including reading and language arts, math, social studies, and even art. Your child will create an avatar and then work through the lessons, which allows parents to track progress. Children are motivated by earning rewards and tickets. And there are options to print activities for off-line practice.
Swift Playgrounds is an app that teaches younger children how to code. If you are raising a future Steve Jobs, this app will lead your child through the app development process. According to the site, your child needs no experience with coding and uses puzzles and challenges to teach the skills.
Write About This is a great creative writing app. It includes 175 pictures and over 375 prompts to spark creative writing in children. The app also allows parents to upload photos and add in their own prompts, making it almost endless with possibilities. Download it onto an iPad and encourage your child to write anytime anywhere.
Best Apps for middle school age students
Quizlet is a great site for studying a variety of material. Students can make digital flashcards – or search the vast library of already-prepared-cards – then play a series of different review games to help learn class material in a fun and engaging way. This app could easily be on the high school list as well.
Citizen Math, formerly known as Mathalicious, is a fantastic site for students to practice math problem solving. The goal of the site is to connect math to the real world, something that most middle school math students see little connection to. Most parents have heard the refrain, “When am I ever to going to use this?” Now you can point them here.
Duolingo boasts that it is a fun way to learn a foreign language. Set in a video game-like mode, students earn points and unlock rewards as they progress through the lessons. The app uses AI to better meet your child where they are and help them to learn the material, which includes learning to read, listen, and speak the language.
Grammaropolis comes to the rescue when students need a deep dive into grammar. In middle school, often teachers begin the (nasty) introduction to diagramming sentences and going way past nouns and verbs. Suddenly parts of speech begin dangling and modifying! For those parents old enough to remember, think School House Rock cartoons back on Saturday mornings as the site uses music videos and animated shorts to teach grammar concepts.
Cam Scanner allows your child to use their phone’s camera to scan a document and turn it into a PDF or any number of other formats. This is perfect for when your child is working on a research project because documents can be scanned then stored for later use. Or, if homework is forgotten – which we know never happens – your child can scan a classmate’s then have it to complete with no penalty for late work.
Best apps for high school age students
Google Docs is a must for high school students. Most teachers prefer it and it allows students to work collaboratively, in real time, with other classmates, which is a 21st century skill teachers ought to be emphasizing. Google docs also works seamlessly with its sister apps such Google Slides and Google Sheets. It also features Smart Compose, which allows the user to focus on their ideas and AI to suggest spelling and phrasing corrections.
The Homework App is an online version of a school planner. For whatever reason, many students – who need them the most! – refuse to use physical planners, where they can record homework assignments and upcoming tests and projects. This app allows students to quickly enter information and even color code it for added layers of organization. Students can set reminders and even upload photos if desired.
Kahoot is great study platform. While the app serves many age groups, high school students will enjoy the creative way it allows them to study information. Many teachers use Kahoot to help students practice skills both in and out of the classroom. Students can search the site for games and flashcards that are already made or they can create their own, then practice in a fun environment.
Mathway is a students’ and parents’ best friend. By high school, math can get challenging. When those pesky problems present themselves, students can enter a problem on the screen, using an easy-to-use keyboard. The site then prompts the student to ask how it would like the answer presented: graph, x or y intercepts, etc. then finally reveals the solution and steps to arrive at it. This app is a life saver for those late night homework sessions.
Insight Timer is perhaps the most important app on our list. It bills itself and the number one app for sleep, anxiety, and stress. Students are quite simply more stressed than ever and this app has both a free section and a premium section that is available with a subscription. Content includes featured speakers, guided and sleep meditations, soothing music, and even courses. Do your child (and yourself) a favor and check out this app.
Final thoughts
Schools’ and teachers’ presentation methods are changing. Even the youngest parents would not recognize what a typical classroom and learning environment looks like in a school today. Digital schools are now the norm, and students complete just about all their assignments on laptops or iPads. Even textbooks are loaded onto school-issued devices. Students need to be tech savvy in order to thrive in today’s schools. While some people may not like it, it is here to stay. This list of the best apps for each age group is an attempt to help parents sort through the clutter that exists in the digital space. Who knows, maybe even Santa will try an organizational app!
If your child struggles with learning in a digital environment or you have questions about technology and apps, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain.
“Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.” – A.A. Milne
Engage the Brain is not unlike the sun-splashed Hundred Acre Woods featured in the classic
Winnie the Pooh stories written by A.A. Milne. We are populated with a variety of characters
who each brings vast experience, diverse personalities, and a love of our mission to help
children ease through school (and childhood) by supplying them with strategies and
interventions all covered in dabs of honey in the form of genuine care, compliments and positive
reinforcement.
We do not take our mission lightly. In fact we are oozing with gratitude for the parents who trust
us with their children. According to Harvard Health Publishing, in positive psychology research,
gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. It goes on to state that
gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, improve their health, and – not surprisingly –
build strong relationships. That is what we strive for at Engage the Brain: strong and trusting
relationships with the children we serve.
How do we accomplish this lofty goal? By offering a suite of services that is unrivaled in Central
Florida. If a child is struggling in school, Engage the Brain can help. Whether it is reading
comprehension, decoding the confounding letters of the alphabet, math struggles, Executive
Functioning issues, or just an overall malaise towards school, we have Learning Specialists
trained to help.
Services offered by Engage the Brain
Orton-Gillingham instruction
Orton-Gillingham has long been declared the gold-standard of instruction for students with dyslexia. According to the website, it is a “method based on the Science of Reading research that focuses on multi-sensory techniques that teach reading and spelling.” Engage the Brain has 20 people trained in O.G.: 8 at the Classroom Educator level (30 hours of training) and 12 at Associate level (60 hours of training). These professionals continually collaborate to bring a child the best in dyslexia instruction practices.
Multi-sensory math instruction
Math is much more than a series of operations and numbers on a piece of paper (or computer screen). To build true understanding and mastery over an abstract concept, instruction must be multi-sensory and directly taught. To that end, three Specialists are trained in Marilyn Zecher’s Multi-sensory math approach. It mirrors “recommendations from current research and suggestions from the National Math Panel regarding instruction for struggling learners.” Additionally, Jennifer Disch is trained in On Cloud Nine, which is a program developed by Lindamood Bell. Like our Orton-Gillingham instructors, the math specialists meet and share best practices so each child receives hands-on instruction tailored to their needs.
Reading comprehension instruction
Students who are not diagnosed with dyslexia but still struggle with comprehending text receive valuable instruction in a variety of researched-backed approaches. One such program that is popular is Visualizing and Verbalizing, also created by Lindamood Bell. This program is perfect for “word callers,” or those children that can read fluently but do not comprehend. Often these students do not create an image in their mind and then miss significant parts of the passage. Benefits of the approach, according to the website, include “development of concept imagery improves reading and listening comprehension, memory, oral vocabulary, critical thinking, and writing.”
Executive Functioning instruction
If a student exhibits a weakness in their executive functions, it will affect just about every area of learning. According to the Center on Developing Child at Harvard, Executive Functions “skills are the mental processes that enable us to plan, focus attention, remember instructions, and juggle multiple tasks successfully.” An exasperated parent may view their child as having no idea how to study. Engage the Brain has Specialists trained in several leading Executive Functions programs including Seeing My Time and the Landmark School, known for their expertise in working with the students with language-based learning disabilities.
Written expression
Written expression can be challenging for students because of the heavy load required to string together sentences. Skills required include: expressive language, receptive language, decoding/encoding, studying, self-regulation and self-efficacy, and fine motor skills. Specialists have been trained a series of approaches including The Institute for Excellence in Writing (IEW), which emphasizes prewriting and constructing sentences orally first to help build towards competent and logical sentence structures. In addition to IEW, Specialists have also trained in methods prescribed by the Landmark School referenced above.
Speech and Language Therapy
Engage the Brain currently has 6 Speech-Language Pathologists. Each offers traditional Speech and Language Therapy, which focuses on students’ speech/articulation needs, as well as receptive and expressive language needs. Many SLPs also work with students with reading difficulties. As a bonus, they tend to incorporate the Speech/Language needs into an Orton-Gillingham lesson.
Occupational Therapy
Engage the Brain is proud to announce the recent hire of an Occupational Therapist. Her main goal is to focus on OT principles such as sensory, self-regulation, fine-motor, and attention. Like our Speech-Language Pathologists, the Occupational Therapist will also work in academic interventions during the sessions.
North Park Learning Group
In addition to all these services, Engage the Brain also offers homeschool students a hybrid school option with the North Park Learning Group. Students ages 7-14 work in small groups in an experiential and academically-focused environment. Project-based learning and direct instruction focus on real-world applications of academic material. Classes are offered Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays and follow the OCPS calendar.
Gratitude conclusion
Engage the Brain truly is the Hundred Acre Wood, a magical place where students can come and discover the best versions of themselves. We are incredibly grateful to all the families that have trusted us to assist their children. Not unlike a tire with too much air and pressure building, Engage the Brain prides itself on being the valve, to help release the pressure built up and allow a child to relax and learn. Jennifer Disch, our Christopher Robin, leads the Specialists and matches each to the child they can best help.
We have a lofty goals at Engage the Brain. We do not want your child to remember us; rather we want them to never forget us. From the bottom of our hearts – and with our bellies full of honey – thank you to everyone who has supported us during the past year.
How can parents best prepare for parent-teacher conferences? By establishing a supportive partnership with teachers and doing their homework prior to the meeting.
With October galloping in with ghosts and goblins and a heavy dose of candy, there is another (potentially) scary event that usually takes place this month: parent-teacher conferences.
For many reasons these time-tested events can strike nerves in all the participants, leaving some to dread the actual 15-minute-ish meeting. But it does not need to- and should not- be this way.
By preparing properly and establishing a supportive partnership with the teacher(s), parent-teacher conferences can be a time for information sharing, questions being answered – by both parties – and formulating a plan to best move your child forward in their academic, social, and emotional growth.
Prior to the conference
As children grow and enter their school-age years, sometimes we can forget that parents are still their child’s first and most important teachers. In theory, your child arrives in the classroom each morning properly fed, well-mannered around other human beings, and ready to learn. If your child’s social-emotional well-being needs assistance, please read our blog post about how to build resilience and support children with these critical skills.
Next, know your child’s teacher’s preferred method of communication. Perhaps during Meet-the-Teacher night or through an early-in-the-school-year email, the teacher sent this information out. Some teachers prefer to use their formal school email; others may use the LMS (Learning Management System) such as Canvas to send and receive messages.
Once you know the preferred contact method, reach out to the teacher a week or two before the conference and ask if there is any information they could send home for you to review prior to the conference. Is there any testing or Progress Monitoring that took place? Or is there any information they would like you to bring to discuss? This way you can generate some questions and feel more informed about your child rather than learning this information at the conference.
Another important step to take prior to the conference is to review your child’s grades through the school’s online grading system. Most every school uses some version of a grading system such as Power School, Renweb, or Edmodo. Typically you will need your child’s username and password to log in and see their current grades.
Finally, talk with your child before the conference. Do they have any concerns or questions they would like answered? Sometimes kids have the best questions to ask, and hearing the teacher’s response/s may be the best way to spend the limited time of the conference. Not sure what to ask? Then these questions from Understood can give you some suggestions.
During the conference
As you head into the school for the conference, remember that your child’s teacher is probably meeting with many parents back to back to back. It is equally stressful on the teacher, who is presumably trying their best to stick to the tight conference schedule. So be prepared to respect the structure and timeframe of the meeting that the teacher has set.
The Harvard Family Research Project has some general information parents can review to help understand the purpose and goals of a typical parent- teacher conference.
If you have a concern about the teacher, one that could get awkward, try using the Oreo method to address it. First, start with a compliment or positive statement for the teacher. “We appreciate the passion and energy you bring to the classroom.” Next, share the concern. “We are concerned that recess is being taken away as a behavior consequence, and we wonder if together we might consider an alternative approach.” Finally, share another positive statement about the teacher. “Addison adores the way you teach addition, and we appreciate your extra efforts to make learning fun.” By sandwiching the concern, you build good will, and hopefully the teacher is more responsive to your concern.
Of course this should be obvious, but in case it isn’t: you need to keep your cool. If the Oreo method does not diffuse a concern, act like an adult! Perhaps the issue will need to be addressed at a later time with a principal or other administrator present.
Bring something to write with and on. It could be as simple as a pen and notebook, or use the notes app on your phone. Recording notes of the interactions can be beneficial later as you try to recall what was and was not discussed.
An important part of the conference is to learn how your child is doing in their academics. But do not forget to ask about those parts of your child that cannot be tested, such character and friendships. How are their social emotional skills doing in comparison to classmates?
Finally, practice active listening and make sure you understand all the information the teacher is sharing. Often times educators can slip into jargon or lingo they use daily, forgetting that non-educators will not know what BYOD (Bring Your Own Device) or an IEP (Individual Education Plan) is. If you are not sure of something, ask!
After the conference
After the conference, it is important that you follow up on any recommendations. For example, if your child is still mastering their basic math facts in any or all of the four operations (add, subtract, multiply, and divide), then set up a daily practice schedule for 10 minutes each day that your child will use. Or schedule an appointment with the eye doctor to see if your child truly has a vision issue, or if they are just “math blind” and numbers send them into temporary blindness!
Commit to communicating regularly with the teacher. Depending on your child’s needs, perhaps a check-in email every other week is appropriate. Keep it short and simple.
And of course talk with your child! Inform them of the results of the conference and any necessary adjustments to their schedule. Will the child start seeing a specialist once a week or engage in some other intervention?
Finally, sending a thank you note or email to the teacher continues to build good will and sends the message that you view yourself as part of your child’s education team.
Final thoughts
October ushers in lots of scary things, such as ill-fitting – and perhaps ill-designed – costumes and an overabundance of pumpkin spice. Parent-teacher conferences need not be on the list of scary events that you encounter. By establishing a cordial and supportive relationship with your child’s teacher from the first day of school and doing your homework prior to the conference, you will put yourself, and more importantly your child, in the best position to succeed.
If you would like assistance with preparing for your child’s parent-teacher conference or have questions after the conference about the recommendations, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to set up a meeting.
Children who feel connected and a sense of belonging perform better. How do parents develop these critical attributes?
As adults we can reflect back on our childhoods and painfully remember times when we were not included. Perhaps it was in gym class when two captains were picked by the PE teacher to select the teams for that day’s game. One player at a time was called by the captains as the less athletic and/or less popular kids stood on the sideline, gazing downward, awkwardly waiting to be called last – a loud and unuttered message that they were not wanted.
Or perhaps it was the time a classmate handed out invitations to a birthday party only to exclude some of the class, sending that same message that was sent in gym class that some children are not welcome or accepted.
Not feeling connected to or having a sense of belonging to school affects many children. In fact, if you walk into the average classroom, one in three students would claim to not feel a sense of belonging. This raises massive concerns. According to Child Watch, not belonging can be linked to feelings of worthlessness, self-doubt, isolation, and sadness. It can affect relationships with others and even grades.
Conversely, students who did feel connected and a sense of belonging tend to perform better. Child Watch shared that “a sense of belonging has been found to help protect children against mental health problems and improve their learning. Children who feel that they belong are happier, more relaxed, and have fewer behavioral problems than others. They are also more motivated and more successful learners.” Furthermore, according to the CDC, connectedness also reduces risk-taking behaviour and violent and antisocial behaviour, as well as the likelihood of emotional problems.
Road blocks to belonging
There are many reasons why a child may not develop a sense of connection or belonging in school. Some common causes include:
Neurodiversity: Children with ADHD, Dyslexia, or Autism Spectrum Disorder often have a difficult time making friends or fitting in.
Low self-esteem: Children who struggle in school often have a poor self-image. This can translate into lack of confidence in social situations and with making friends.
Cliques: Cliques are a part of most middle and high schools social environments. Some students are simply not as adept at navigating these seemingly ruleless and ruthless packs.
Fear of Failure: Some children just do not like to take risks of any size or shape due to the potential perceived negative consequences. This can result in a lonely and disconnected social life.
The benefits of belonging and connection
When children engage with other children it provides opportunities to develop connection and belonging. For most kids these times are during school. The website Raising Children lists three important benefits for children to create a sense of belonging. First and perhaps obviously, it provides opportunities for children to learn about getting along with others. Second, it develops a group of people that children can go to when they need help. And third, it provides a network as your child ages from which they can learn about different jobs, skills, and opportunities in the community.
How do you know if a particular group would be good for your child? ACECQA’s National Education Leader, Rhonda Livingstone lists four traits that make a “sense of community”:
- Belonging: Feeling you are part of the community.
- Influence: Feeling you ‘matter’ and can make a difference.
- Integration and fulfillment of needs: Feeling your needs can be met.
- Shared emotional connection: Feeling of an attachment through shared experience, place or history.
Use these four traits of a positive community when discussing possible school or after school activities with your child.
Developing belonging and connection
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a popular psychological axiom. It is divided into five levels with the basic or bottom level including physiological needs such as food and shelter; the second level of safety, which includes health and employment; and the third level of love and belonging, which includes friendship, family, and a sense of belonging. The psychological theory is a pyramid stating that the lower levels of human needs must be met before the next level can be achieved. The goal, according to the model, is self-actualization which is desiring to be the best version of one’s self.
Our focus is on Maslow’s third level. Of course as mentioned above, children need opportunities to connect and feel that sense of belonging. Here are some typical places children might look to to find their community with like-minded people.
Sports team: If your child is athletic and is interested in sports, joining a team can provide amazing opportunities to make lasting friendships and quality relationships. Numerous studies reveal that high school students who participated in sports graduated at a higher rate than those who did not compete and had higher grade point averages. Sports also teach valuable life lessons such as accountability, respect for others, and determination.
School band or choir: Encouraging your child to play an instrument or sing in the choir can pay academic dividends. According to a study in Psychology Today, students who participated in music programs had higher standardized test scores than non-participants. And most communities offer after school music programs if the school option does not appeal to your child.
After school clubs: Most schools – elementary, middle and high – offer some selection of after school clubs. They may range from photography to student newspaper to art and even playing board games. By encouraging your child to seek out information about their school’s offerings, it places them with other kids who have a shared interest, raising the chances of forging meaningful friendships.
Volunteering: Many high schools require community service hours to graduate. Beyond that mandate, volunteering can provide a child with the chance to interact with other like-minded people who share their interests. Most communities have ample options for teens to get involved with agencies such as pet shelters, food banks, and/or the Red Cross. A quick search engine peek should reveal some great options in your community.
Theater: Whether through school or an organization in your community, perhaps your child is a budding thespian. Or maybe they are the more “off-stage” type and would enjoy making sets and props. Either way, joining in with a group of people that have a shared goal is a wonderful way for children to develop friendships and that sense of connection.
Scouts: All levels of Scouting (Cub, Brownie, Boy and Girl) offer great opportunities for your child to develop valuable skills and relationships. As your child works towards certain badges or goals, they are bound to foster friendships with their other den or troop members.
Final Thoughts
Having a true sense of belonging and a connection to a group is critical for children. Kids with these traits develop a sense of armor that helps them through difficult times. Of course school is one of the more important organizations that your child hopefully feels connected to. But there are other options to build this sense of connection with. Whether you have a little linebacker who thrives on the field, a groovy guitarist who jams with other musicians, or a skilled scout embarking on a badge quest, encouraging your child to explore their interests is essential for them to develop a strong sense of connection.
If your child struggles with fitting in and/or feeling like they are not connected to their school or other organizations, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how a Learning Specialist may be able to help.
How do you set your child up for success at the beginning of the school year? By focusing on your child’s Executive Functions.
Back to school.
This three-word phrase can conjure up different emotions for different populations of people. For students, it could be a mixture of excitement, apprehension, and guarded optimism. For parents, it may be like this commercial, featuring a dad frolicking through Staples to the holiday classic “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of Year,” tossing school supplies into a shopping cart while his two children follow and scowl.
Whatever your thoughts and emotions about back to school are, one thing parents can do now is prepare their children to start the school year with a focus on their Executive Functions. We have written about Executive Functions before, but this article will focus on preparing your child to start the school year off in an organized, thoughtful, and intentional way.
In the article Executive function in children: Why it matters and how to help from Harvard Health Publishing, it says executive functions “supervise and coordinate a multitude of cognitive, behavioral, and emotional tasks.” The article goes on to say that although our executive function skills begin to develop in the first year of life, they are not fully developed until early adulthood. And, executive functioning skills do not develop in a linear progression.
What exactly are Executive Functions?
There are several good analogies for Executive Functions. One is as the conductor of a full city orchestra, manipulating each section of musicians to elicit a coordinated, sometimes nuanced, and beautiful result. Another comparison is that of an air traffic controller, who helps a multitude of planes of various sizes take off and land safely. Whichever analogy you prefer, one can see the complexity and interlocking elements that make up the skill set.
According to the Center on the Developing Child, the major components of executive functions include:
Working memory: which governs our ability to retain and work with pieces of information over short periods of time.
Mental flexibility: which helps us sustain or shift our focus in response to different demands or to apply different rules in different settings.
Self-control: which allows us to set priorities and resist impulsive actions or responses to stimuli.
Focus on the whole child
One aspect of Executive Functions that perhaps does not get enough attention is that the whole child is involved in successfully navigating school and life. Marydee Sklar, who is fabulous and operates the company Executive Functions Success, focuses on three key foundations at the beginning of her Seeing My Time course: nutrition, exercise, and sleep.
Clearly your child must be healthy in order to thrive in school and extracurricular activities. Ensure your child is eating well, getting the proper exercise, and the prescribed amount of sleep. If these three cornerstones are in place, then your child will be ready to accept coaching and guidance in Executive Functions.
Strategies to promote Executive Functions success
Once your child – with your guidance and encouragement – has a handle on their nutrition, exercise, and sleep, try the following six strategies to organize, plan, and establish routines.
Create a “Landing Pad” at home for backpacks, jackets, etc.
Somewhere in your home create a landing pad, where your child can drop off school items such as their backpack, sports equipment, and or jackets. Perhaps the location is inside the front door or in a mudroom. The point is to have one location for all the belongings so everyone knows where the items are.
Establish routines
If your child attends a traditional brick and mortar school, then the two blocks of time to schedule are before school and after school. Establish a routine for before school by communicating what must be done. Tasks may include showering, eating breakfast, packing a lunch (or having lunch money), ensuring all school materials and homework are in the backpack, and/or laptop charged. Creating a routine for after school may include completing homework, practicing a musical instrument, having a snack, attending a sports practice or game, completing chores, free time, and eating dinner.
Routines ease anxiety because your child knows what to expect. Obviously you will need to tailor the items for your child.
Use checklists
Going along with establishing routines, creating and printing checklists and placing them in high-traffic locations, will be visual reminders for your child of what is expected of them. Understood has some examples that you can print. If your child has a locker at school, a separate checklist can be created and taped in it so your child remembers to bring everything she needs home. Or, if there is no locker, a checklist can be attached inside their backpack.
Use a planner
For some reason students seem to balk at using a planner. And ironically it is the students who need the planner the most who protest the loudest! From the first day of school, encourage your child to use some version of daily planner. It may be a physical paper planner that some schools supply. Or, it could be using a digital planner such as the “notes” or “reminders” that most smartphones have. Students should include all of their activities in the planner: homework, upcoming tests or projects, sports practices, play rehearsals, doctor’s appointments, etc. All of their responsibilities ought to be in one place!
Use clocks to make time visual
A refrain heard often during the school year from children is that they do not have any time for themselves. They complain the day is taken up with school, homework, and chores. Perhaps there is a “I hate you!” sprinkled in there too.They gripe there is no time for friends, tv, or video games, the trifecta of the traumatized teenager.
A parent can help their child visualize their time and assist them in seeing that if they manage their allotted time correctly, there is time every day for the fun stuff too! Placing an analog clock (one with a face and hands) in the study area is one way for children to see time tick by. (Another option is to use a kitchen timer.) Encourage your child to estimate how long an assignment ought to take. Then refer to the clock, do some quick mental math, and calculate when the assignment ought to be completed by. This can be an eye-opening exercise for students who tend to waste time while allegedly studying.
Model the behaviors
In a study in the journal Early Child Development and Care, it was found that students who successfully developed Executive Functions skills had a positive family environment along with parents who practiced and modeled the skills. So use a planner and explain how it helps organize and prioritize your day. Keep your belongings organized – the kitchen island is not a good “Landing Pad!” Share your checklists that you may use at work to accomplish your goals. Allow your child to see these skills in action in the real world.
Final thoughts
Back to school can be an exciting and stressful time of the year for students. To help put your child in the best position to succeed, and relieve some of the anxiety, parents can focus on their child’s Executive Functions. Establish routines, employ checklists, and insist that your child use a planner. You can reenforce their importance by modeling these strategies in your own life! Encouraging these skills from the first day of school will allow your child to be proactive and thrive throughout the year.
If you feel like your child struggles with Executive Functions, contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to learn how a Learning Specialist could help your child develop these critical skills.
How do you build resilience in children? By communicating and allowing your child to practice falling down in safe, low-risk environments.
Life is hard. And people can debate whether growing up today is more challenging than it was 20, 30 or even 40 years ago. One aspect of childhood that will never change is the presence of adversity and stress. As parents, we want to protect our kids and envelope them in bubble wrap every time they leave the house. This may safeguard them against physical dangers, but what about those invisible stressors such as studying for tests or trying out for a team or a school play?
Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a version of bubble wrap that could protect your kids from all types of trauma and stress? Surprisingly, there is!
And it is called resilience.
What is resilience?
According to the American Psychological Association, “Building resilience—the ability to adapt well to adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or even significant sources of stress—can help our children manage stress and feelings of anxiety and uncertainty.”
Of course childhood is littered with stressors of all different sizes and magnitudes. And each child’s view of a given situation is different. Confronted with the same problem, one child may see a speed bump while another child glares up at Mt. Everest.
What accounts for these point-of-view differences? Certainly a child’s DNA can contribute, but perhaps more importantly the answer lies in the child’s parents providing opportunities for the child to practice problem solving in safe environments.
Why build resilience?
Building resilience is like providing your child with superhero powers. Anxiety, setbacks, and trauma can be framed appropriately and dealt with in a rational method.
Just as importantly, building resilience in children helps them to overcome obstacles more easily and reduces the chances of their suffering from anxiety or other stress-related disorders later in life.
What parent does not want that?!
How to build resilience
The Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University says, “The single most common factor for children who develop resilience is at least one stable and committed relationship with a supportive parent, caregiver, or other adult.”
Among other factors that contribute to developing resiliency are:
- facilitating supportive adult-child relationships
- building a sense of self-efficacy and perceived control
- providing opportunities to strengthen adaptive skills and self-regulatory capacities
To expand on building this critical life-skill in children, Engage the Brain contacted Dr. John Avritt, Robin Coach, and Master Resiliency Trainer and Performance Expert who works with soldiers at Fort Hood in Texas.
Dr. Avritt’s first piece of advice revolves around dinner time. He encourages everyone to put away their phones and devices, and for parents to pose three questions to their kids.
First, what is something everyone did today that made them proud?
Second, what is something everyone appreciates about today?
And third, what is something everyone is looking forward to tomorrow or in the near future?
Dr. Avritt said, “This will help everyone begin to notice the good things in the moment, daily, plus it will help everyone in the house turn off their stress switches before bed, which will promote better sleep.” And he added that it will help with family communication.
In addition to discussing these three questions, Dr. Avritt encourages families to take advantage of “confetti,” what he refers to as unexpected free time during the day. Because we as a society are more efficient than we have ever been – some studies suggest we worked 10% more 20 years ago – we are gifted pockets of time which can come in the form of as little as 10 or 15 extra minutes or sometimes even a whole day. Dr. Avritt says to NOT fill that time with more work! He suggests using the time to enhance your relationship with your child, which reinforces Harvard’s finding as the single most important part of developing resiliency in children.
Other ways to develop resilience
Dr. Avritt reports there are five core competencies that all people need to practice to develop resilience.
1. Building self-awareness
We all have thoughts and reactions to life’s events. Do we have the ability to capture those thoughts, identify what emotions and reactions are being driven by those thoughts, and ask the question, “Are my thoughts helping me or harming me?”
2. Regulation of thoughts
Dr. Avritt says, “If we want to dictate certain emotions, it begins by taking the thoughts we’ve captured and reframing, reinterpreting, or repurposing them for our benefit.” Parents can help with this by constructive conversation and not hijacking a dialogue. There is a common contradiction: parents want their child to problem solve, but when the child fails, the parent is quick to jump in and fix the situation. This can send mixed messages to the child.
3. Connection
Nobody is expected to travel through life alone. Help your child understand the power of relationships and both how to be a helper and how to get help. Model how to be a good listener and how to ask questions. This helps build empathy, compassion, listening skills, and connection to others.
4. Internal strengths
Teach your child to learn and develop an understanding of who they are. It is important that children use their strengths to their advantage and not dwell on who they are not. Parents can help point out their child’s inner strengths and provide concrete examples to back up their point of view.
5. Optimism
We all need to practice recognizing the good that happens to us on a daily basis. Dr. Avritt says that this will counteract human nature’s negativity bias. By engaging in a daily dinnertime conversation and using the three guiding questions listed above, parents can chip away at their child’s potential negative viewpoints and replace them with more resilient thoughts.
Finally, Dr. Avritt implores parents to not be afraid to let their child fall down or fail. “Dictating to our kids how and when to perform is a parent problem, a result of protecting our own egos,” says Dr. Avritt. To be resilient, kids need to experience adversity so they can figure out how to get back up. And if they can’t get back up, then parents can join in and help the child determine the best way to solve the given situation.
Final thoughts
Our lives are littered with stress and anxiety- which come in all shapes and sizes- pretty much on a daily basis. Helping your child build resilience and develop a toolbox full of strategies to help confront these situations is paramount for parents. The research is clear: a supportive parent who provides opportunities to practice problem-solving in low stakes situations helps a child develop this critical skill. Using daily conversations that focus on promoting self-awareness and optimism are essential for your child’s future success.
If you believe your child struggles with stress, anxiety and how to appropriately respond to stressful situations, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain to discover how a Learning Specialist could assist your child in developing strategies to build their resilience.
What is social emotional learning? And how can parents use it to help reset their child’s mental health?
Last month we wrote about the importance of resetting your child’s summer schedule and goals with a clarion call to prioritize their mental health. Children – all of us, actually – have been through tremendous stressors and uncertainties over the past two years. But in reality there has been a mental health crisis building in children over the past decade or more.
The reasons are varied. Increased social media consumption and comparing themselves in their very realistic and messy 3-D life to a carefully crafted digital 2-D presentation of classmates on Instagram can be confusing for youngsters. Clearly isolation and lack of social connection during the pandemic have contributed. And the stressors of family illness and/or job security are playing a part.
The statistics back this up. From March 2020 to October 2020, mental health–related emergency department visits increased 24% for children ages 5 to 11 and 31% for those ages 12 to 17, compared with 2019 emergency department visits, according to CDC data. These visits were for varied reasons- including eating disorders, anxiety, trauma, and obsessive-compulsive disorders.
But as mentioned above, these issues had been percolating below the surface in children for years. In an article in The New York Times, John T. Walkup, chairman of the psychiatry and behavioral-health department at Lurie Children’s Hospital of Chicago, said, “The biggest misconception is that Covid makes people mentally ill. From my point of view, Covid unmasked people who have underlying vulnerabilities.” Indeed, those people who had been hanging on by a thread felt that razor thin margin of error falter as the reality of the pandemic hit.
Social Emotional Learning (SEL)
What is the antidote? Enter social emotional learning.
What is social emotional learning? The Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL) defines it like this: “SEL is the process through which all young people and adults acquire and apply the knowledge, skills, and attitudes to develop healthy identities, manage emotions and achieve personal and collective goals, feel and show empathy for others, establish and maintain supportive relationships, and make responsible and caring decisions.”
At the heart of SEL, CASEL has identified five competencies that support learning and development of children:
• self-awareness: child understands his or her own strengths and weaknesses and how their behavior affects others.
• self-management: child learns how to regulate their behaviors and emotions.
• social awareness: child understands social norms, can recognize other people’s emotions, and empathize with people from a variety of backgrounds.
• relationship skills: child can foster healthy relations with individuals and in groups.
• making responsible decisions: child learns how to make decisions independently, whether it is a school-based decision or personal matter, while considering social norms and all appropriate consequences – both positive and negative – of the decision.
CASEL’s research has indicated positive academic gains and better emotional health when SEL is part of the curriculum. In particular:
• SEL interventions that address the five core competencies increased students’ academic performance by 11 percentile points, compared to students who did not participate.
• Students participating in SEL programs showed improved classroom behavior, an increased ability to manage stress and depression, and better attitudes about themselves, others, and school.
A study in the journal Perspectives on Psychological Science called “Promoting the Social and Emotional Learning of Millions of School Children,” produced the following findings: “Through explicit instruction, social and emotional skills can be taught, modeled, and practiced so that children, adolescents, and adults can handle daily tasks, interactions, and challenges effectively.” These critical skills can be broached and taught at home! Maybe parents and caregivers can even learn something too!
Warning signs your child may be struggling
While every child may have mood swings from time to time – hello teenagers! – there are signs parents can look for that may signal that a larger issue is lurking. According to the National Library of Medicine, parents can look for these:
Physical signs:
• decreased appetite, and or change in eating habits
• Sleep disturbances
• Physical symptoms: headache, stomachache with no illness
Emotional or behavioral signs:
• Anxiety, worry
• New or recurring fears
• Anger outbursts and or crying
• Aggressive or stubborn behavior
• Doesn’t want to participate in school or family activities
If your child is exhibiting any of these warning signs, please contact your child’s pediatrician. If you are interested in locating a mental health professional, the Department of Health and Human Services or SAMHSA has a website.
Teaching SEL at home
Hopefully you are convinced of the importance of teaching and nurturing SEL skills. Not only will they improve your child’s academic performance, they will help build resiliency and problem-solving skills critical to their success as adults.
So how do you teach these critically important skills at home? Thoughtfully and intentionally. In other words, target one of the five competencies listed above, and try some of the activities presented below to help your child nurture their SEL skills.
Self-awareness:
To foster self-awareness in your child, help them identify their emotions and feelings. Guide them to react to their emotions properly by taking deep breaths or engaging in a physical activity such as taking a walk. Further, help your child identify their strengths and weaknesses so that compliments and criticisms can be framed appropriately.
Self-management:
Building self-management can be fun when using games. Games like Jenga require focus and precision to succeed in removing pieces from the tower. Another great game is Don’t Break the Ice, which also requires a steady hand and an element of tempered force. Even the traditional game Simon Says can help children learn to manage their movements and thoughts based on the leader’s commands.
Social awareness:
After having a conversation with another person or even another family member, discuss it with your child. Focus on each person’s body language and tone, which contributes to the civility – or lack there of – in the conversation. Remember to discuss non-verbal cues, which will allow your child the opportunity to learn how these can make other people feel. Perhaps most importantly is to be a good role model for your child. Most kids are like sponges, soaking up how you treat and interact with other people.
Relationship skills:
Forming, developing, and maintaining relationships is critical for your child to succeed in life. Pick a good friend of your child’s and ask your child why his friend is special. Perhaps the friend is supportive or kind or shares common interests. Emphasize the importance of reciprocating those skills with his friends. Just as important point out any unhealthy relationships your child may have. Discuss what the supposed friend does that is “toxic” and share conflict resolution strategies.
Making responsible decisions:
Neuropsychologists allege we make over 35,000 decisions a day. While some are small – which shirt to wear – others are huge – should I cross the street now or wait for the truck to pass – learning how to make responsible decisions is critical for your child’s development. Luckily there is a formula or series of steps you can teach: Identify the problem to be solved; gather relevant information; brainstorm possible solutions; identify possible consequences; make a choice; take action. Model these steps with problems you face so your child can see them in action in real life.
Final thoughts
Parents can use SEL at home to help their child become better equipped to deal with the world in which they live. And their academics will improve too! By acknowledging there is a mental health crisis in our country, parents can start a dialogue with their children and simply ask, “How are you doing?” During those conversations teach them the five core competencies that make up SEL. Perhaps not right away, but eventually they will thank you.
If you believe your child could benefit from SEL strategies and would like more detailed information, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain.
What is the ideal 2022 summer schedule for a school-aged child? A little learning, a lot of movement, and a heavy dose of play.
It is May and nearing the end of the school year, so most education blogs targeting parents write the obligatory article on the “Summer Slide.” Of course, the Summer Slide, or Summer Brain Drain, is the loss of learning and/or regression of academic skills a child experiences over the summer months.
But this summer – the summer of 2022 – seems like a perfect time for parents to rethink their child’s summer schedule. Perhaps reevaluate what is important for your child to achieve during the summer months. While the threat of learning loss is real, there is a bigger menace out there targeting your child: a mental health crisis.
As the school year comes to a close, may we suggest parents focus on or redefine a new North Star: a relaxed, confident and mentally healthy child. Because the statistics about children and mental health are scary. The National Alliance on Mental Health states that 20% of youth ages 13-18 live with a mental health condition; 11% of youth have a mood disorder; and 8% of youth have an anxiety disorder. The statistics for LBGQT+ children are even more frightening. The COVID-19 pandemic has exacerbated these numbers! Social isolation, job security of parents, and loss of loved ones are a few of the reasons why children’s anxiety and depression have escalated.
How should parents approach this summer? In a word: balance. As the amazing author Robert Fulgham said, “Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.” This quote is the perfect North Star for this summer of 2022.
Summer Slide stats
Much has been written about the Summer Slide, including which students it affects and how. Most reasonable people can agree that if a child does not read or write something over the summer, their language skills will regress. The same is true in math if no computation or work with numbers occurs either.
In the article “What we know and what we’re learning” by Megan Kuhfeld, the author shares some research from recent studies. The first study, “School’s out: The role of summers in understanding achievement disparities,” was recently published in the American Educational Research Journal and examined summer learning loss across grades 1–8. The study found the average student lost 17-34% of the previous year’s learning gains over summer break; and students who lose ground over one summer are more likely to lose ground in the ensuing summers.
A Southern Methodist University study conducted by Chalie Patarapichayatham, PhD, ambitiously attempted to parse out Summer Slide statistics from COVID-19 Slide statistics. Not surprisingly, he found that students performed lower throughout the 2020-2021 school year, when many schools were employing remote or hybrid learning models. In reading, students experienced a Summer Slide in some grades, but all students experienced a COVID-19 Slide. In math, all students experienced a Summer Slide and COVID-19 Slide. And the study found that students lost their math ability more rapidly than their reading ability, and the loss was larger in upper elementary students.
Create a summer routine with lots of flexibility
So, how do you balance the need for academics to keep your child from experiencing summer learning loss and the clear call for a mental health reset? By creating a routine that has lots of flexibility that includes some learning, some movement and some play.
Incorporate lots of exercise and movement
Children do not seem to be getting the necessary exercise they need for a healthy lifestyle. Each day kids needs to be getting their heart rate up. How do you determine whether your child is actually doing enough? Turn to the CDC.
Exercise intensity levels from the CDC are broken down like this: On a scale of 0 to 10, where sitting is a 0 and the highest level of activity is a 10, moderate-intensity activity is a 5 or 6. When children do moderate-intensity activity, their heart beats faster, and they breathe much harder than when they are at rest or sitting. Vigorous-intensity activity is a level 7 or 8.
Harvard School of Health – and who doesn’t trust an Ivy League institution – says that children need 60 minutes of moderate to vigorous exercise every day, though it does not need to be done all at once. It could be 10 minutes bursts with vigorous level exercise at least 3 days a week.
If your child plays a sport, chances are they are meeting the movement requirement. However, if your chid does not play on a team, you need to find ways to get them moving. This article from Nemours Children’s Health has some wonderful tips to get your child active.
Sprinkle in some learning
As mentioned above, the Summer Slide is real and children will lose ground over the summer if they do not engage in some form of learning. And while our focus is on resetting your child’s mental health, they still need to keep their skills active; falling behind academically can be very stressful for students. Some research suggests that reading as few as four books over the summer is enough to stave off learning loss. And, as referenced above, math takes a hit too. Math workbooks – while well-intentioned – do not fight off the Summer Slide. Children need higher level challenges with numbers. Great Schools has some activities to keep the kids counting over the summer.
Don’t forget the play
Too often children are over-scheduled during the school year. In addition to meeting the demands of being a successful student, some children balance a multitude of after-school activities. So while you are acting as a coach and blowing your whistle to get your kid moving, and playing teacher and demanding your child read, do not forget good old-fashioned play.
Believe it or not, it is okay for your child to be bored! Because out of that boredom can emerge creativity. Also, it will place your child in the present, where they can focus on the here and now. The word “mindfulness” has gotten a lot of attention recently and for good reason: by allowing your child to sit with their thoughts, they can truly focus on their environment and find things to do.
In addition to fostering an environment where your child must create their own play, there are many fantastic and easy activities that you can turn to when needed. Edutopia has a great list of activities to help foster play in your child.
Final thoughts
Children are stressed and are literally facing a mental health crisis. This summer is the perfect opportunity to reset your child’s whole world view. Yes, academics are important and the Summer Brain Drain is real, but if your child is stressed, depressed, anxious, or all of the above, then academics are not the top priority. While happy is an elusive and perhaps misplaced goal, mentally healthy should be the focus for your child for this summer.
To reach this goal, one can think of it another way. Most dietitians recommend a combination of 45-65% carbohydrates, 10-35% protein and 20-35% fat. But rather than food percentages, break a summer day into 10-35% summer learning; 20-35% exercise and movement; and 45-65% play or whatever lights up your child’s heart.
If you would like to discuss ways to create a balanced summer schedule for your child, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain.
As the school year draws to a close, here is the ultimate list of advice, tips, and tasks for parents to complete.
It is mid-April and in Florida the end of the school year is rapidly approaching. As a parent, you may have a mix of emotions as you watch your child complete an orbit through another school year. Like a ferris wheel rotating, with its speed ebbing and flowing as seasons come and go, the end of the school year seems to accelerate to a crescendoing end.
Depending on their grade, your child may just be starting their school journey, and you have many years of milestones and celebrations ahead. Or, perhaps you have a high school student, who, like a magnet, has been more attracted to their friends and social obligations than you and your home.
Whichever end of the spectrum you are on – or perhaps you are traversing the turbulent middle school years, which places you literally in the middle – the end of the school year requires a parent’s attention to detail to help your child finish the school year strongly.
And wouldn’t it be nice if there were a master list of tasks to complete? Like someone scoured the internet and curated the best tips and tasks for parents to complete before the end of the school year.
You are in luck because Engage the Brain did just that! What follows is a comprehensive list of advice, tasks, and tips for parents to complete as their child’s school year comes to a close.
Tasks to complete
Add end of school year events to calendar
The end of the school year may bring school concerts, play performances, graduations, and or other special events. Be sure to add them to your family calendar (you have one these, right?) to avoid conflicts with other obligations.
Maintain a schedule
Encourage and perhaps even demand that your child maintain a schedule. Enforce bedtimes, homework times, and meal times to ease the hectic nature of the last month of school.
Motivate/reward (bribe) to end school year strong
Spring fever can hit kids hard, and motivation and interest in school can wane quickly. While internal motivation is always best to cultivate, combatting and treating spring fever may require some external encouragement. Whatever motivates your child, perhaps this is the time of year to offer up incentives to ensure your child finishes exams, projects, and papers with the proper attention and effort.
Return all school property
Begin gathering all the items that need to be returned to school. Library books (do those still exist?), athletic equipment, text books, etc. all typically need to be returned to avoid a fine or replacement cost.
Review community service hours for teens (if required)
If your child is in high school, they may have a service hour requirement. These can be required for scholarships and graduation, so ensure your child is making the appropriate progress towards the service goal.
Review child’s accommodations (IEP/504)
If your child has an IEP or 504 plan, typically the school will hold a meeting to review the accommodations listed. Discuss these with your child. Is the school providing the accommodations? Are they working? Should you add one or change one? Be prepared for the meeting or request a meeting if necessary.
Apply/extend any financial aid or scholarships for next year
Make sure you complete any paperwork or visit any websites required to apply for or extend any financial aid or scholarships (Family Empowerment Scholarship, McKay, Gardiner for example) your child receives. Most have firm deadlines, so review the requirements and act now.
Firm up plans for next school year
Is your child returning to the same school? If so, you are all set. If not, ensure all details all taken care of for the new school so your child can seamlessly matriculate into the next school year.
Ease anxiety (about next school year if child is making a jump from elementary to middle or middle to high school)
Going along with the previous pearl of wisdom, if your child is switching to a new school, make plans to visit the new one either at the end of the current school year (if possible) or even during the summer. Perhaps chatting with siblings or friends with siblings who attend the school can ease jitters and concerns.
Thank you’s and or gifts for impactful people: teachers, coaches, …
As the year winds down, plan which impactful people at your child’s school – or other locations – you would like to formally thank. Purchase thank you cards or other tokens of appreciation in advance so you are prepared to acknowledge those important people.
Plan summer learning activities
To avoid the summer slide, plan what enrichment, remediation, and/or therapies your child will need to address this summer. Professionals who work in these fields fill up their respective schedules quickly, so act now to reserve your child’s spot.
Enroll in summer camps
After two summers of uncertainty due to COVID-19, many camps will be open and ready for children. Plan which one(s) your child will attend and reserve your spot(s) because they will fill up.
Plan job opportunities for teens
Summer jobs are great opportunities for teenagers to learn (or practice) responsibility and earn a few spending dollars. Not sure if your child is ready for a “real” job? Family Education has some information for parents to consider.
Celebrate
Finally, don’t forget to celebrate! Successfully navigating another school year ought to be honored. Perhaps dinner at a family favorite restaurant or some other reward to acknowledge your child’s (and your) hard work.
Bonus activity
It would be a wonderful tradition to start by holding an end of year interview with your child. With video capability on most smartphones, recording the conversation would be easy and a fantastic keepsake.
Possible questions to ask your child could include:
What is the most important thing you learned this year?
What is your favorite memory of this school year?
How have you changed this year?
What is something hard you did?
Who was your favorite teacher?
What was the best gossip this year?
Final thoughts
The end of the school year is a hectic and busy time of the year. Like a planet orbiting around the sun, your child is completing another important journey as they finish one more grade. While emotions such as pride and nostalgia (or anger and bewilderment) may bubble up to the surface, remember to complete all the necessary tasks to ensure your child finishes the school year with effort and confidence.
If you have any questions about your child’s end of school year tasks, summer plans, or academic needs, please contact Jennifer Disch at Engage the Brain.